


You Take My Breath Away

by broadwayboy69



Category: Glee
Genre: Angst, Drama, Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Major Illness, Romance, Surgery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-28
Updated: 2016-10-28
Packaged: 2018-08-27 11:44:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 25,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8400418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/broadwayboy69/pseuds/broadwayboy69
Summary: Kurt and Blaine have a fight and Blaine storms out resulting in Kurt’s heart breaking further. But is all the pain from a broken heart or are his symptoms related to something more medical. Blaine is then filled with a lot of regrets and needs to reevaluate how he views the people in his life.
Starts with: Jeremiah/Blaine ends with Klaine





	1. Kurt POV

Kurt knew it was stupid to be jealous, but it wasn’t like he had not tried to get over Blaine; he even got his friends to try to help him get over Blaine, but he was still crushing on him as hard as ever. Kurt really did just want to be happy for Blaine that he had a boyfriend, but it was hard and it exhausted him to force himself to be happy for Blaine. In fact he was tired all the time. And that is how it started. He was just tired and started to sleep more. Then it turned into losing his appetite. Kurt assumed he was just depressed about the Blaine situation and therefore didn’t think anything of his symptoms. 

Kurt began to feel dizzy. Blaine had been going on and on about how wonderful his boyfriend is and how great it is having a boyfriend. It was the same old and that’s probably how Blaine felt about same old Kurt, who was only friends with him, most likely out of pity. In fact he was probably only a friend with Kurt out of pity since Kurt had no other friends. Kurt slightly shook his head and blinked a few times trying to focus on Blaine.

“… Anyway so will you help me?” Blaine asked taking a sip of his coffee.

Kurt wishes he were now paying closer attention. “Help you?”

“Find the perfect outfit to profess my love for-“

“You love him?” Kurt cut him off a little shocked Blaine is already talking about love, and he figured it would hurt but not so physically. He can literally feel his breath from escape him and his chest tighten from Blaine squeezing his heart.

“ Were you not listening to a word I said?” Blaine accused. 

“I’m sorry Blaine I’m not feeling well, I’ve been really exhausted for a couple days now.” Kurt explained, and it wasn’t a total lie. He had been out of it for a few days now.

“That’s because you’re over working yourself with school work. I know you’re trying to catch up so you can graduate on time, and that Dalton’s course loud is a lot heavier than your old school’s but you still should take a break for some fun once in a while,” Blaine quipped.

“It’s not like you’ve had time or have wanted to hang out with me or anything,” Kurt snapped back. It came out without thinking, but it wasn’t like it wasn’t the truth.

“I’m spending time with you right now.”

“But you’re not all here. Your mind isn’t spending time with me.” Kurt argued knowing this was going to lead to a fight. He hated fighting with Blaine but it seemed unavoidable now. Kurt has been keeping everything bottled and quiet for so long and he needed to express how he felt to Blaine … well how he felt about Blaine not spending time with him … before he really exploded.

“You’re one to talk. You missed everything I just said.” Blaine protested, and yeah he was right Kurt did miss everything Blaine had said, but that wasn’t the point.

“Because all you talk about is your boyfriend and you love him? Really? It’s only been a month Blaine.” Kurt explained letting his emotions finally take over as he began to rave and rant about the last month. “Plus it’s weird that he has never introduced you to any of his friends, and that you have no idea where he lives. For all you know he is living a double life!” By the time he was done Kurt was out of breath. Blaine sat back crossing his arms and legs while blowing a loud breath out his nose. Kurt knew Blaine was outraged by now.

“Are you finished?” he hissed. Kurt nodded, still trying to get control of his breathing. “First of all you have no idea what it is like to be even love or even have a boyfriend. I don’t have that same stupid infatuation you felt over Finn, who you knew could never love you back.”

Ouch that one hurt, but Kurt continued to sit there now almost in shock as Blaine continued to take cheap shots at Kurt.

“Second of all just because you’re jealous of him or whatever doesn’t mean you shouldn’t like him. And even though you don’t like him doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be happy for me. I thought we were friends and friends are happy for each other.” Blaine stood up shaking his head, unable to even look at Kurt before storming out.

Kurt stood up after him to stop him from leaving so they could talk things through, but as he quickly stood up he felt a small flutter and spots swarmed his tilted vision. He breathed Blaine’s name out of his lips hoping to grab his attention that something was wrong but he was long gone. 

That’s the last thing Kurt remembers before the darkness consumes him.

When Kurt awakes and clears the fog from his head he starts to freak out when he feels something in his nose and on his hands. A nurse rushes to his side to prevent him from pulling at the tubes and calms him down. “Kurt, you are in the hospital. We are going to help you. Your Dad is right outside filling out some forms. I will go get him for you and then the Doctor will be in shortly to see you.”

Kurt fights to keep his eyes open as he waits for his Dad. It isn’t long before his Dad comes rushing to his side and grabbing his hand, telling Kurt how worried he was. Kurt tries to apologize for scaring his father and making him give up a days work but Burt will hear none of it. Before the doctor comes in Burt tries to help him sit up and have him drink some water.

As the doctor comes in he notices the worried look on his Dad’s face. The Doctors were only this quick with his mother when they knew right away things could be seriously wrong.

“Kurt, I’m glad to see you awake. I’m Doctor Berns and will be taking care of you along with Nurse Hannah. I need to ask you a couple questions. Do you think you are up to that?” He asked as he pulled out his pen and pad.

“Sure, but can my dad stay?” Kurt rasped before trying to clear his throat. Burt reached over and grabbed his hand to let Kurt know he wasn’t going anywhere.

“Of course. How have you been feeling lately?”

“Um … tired mostly.”

“He’s complained about being tired but I thought it was just because he was studying hard for his upcoming exams before winter break” Burt cut in.

Doctor Berns nodded and wrote some notes before looking up again, “Okay, how long have you been feeling tired?”

“I guess about two weeks or so that I noticed how weirdly tired I was.”

“What do you mean by weird?”

“I would take naps and made sure to get eight hours of sleep a night and I was still tired.” Kurt tired to read the doctor’s face after his response but it stayed stolid.

“Have you been feeling any sort of pain anywhere?”

“Mostly my chest.”

“Front or back?”

“um … both.”

“And when did you start feeling this pain?”

“I’m not sure.” Kurt said quietly and whispered an “I’m sorry”

“It’s okay. You are doing great. I know it’s hard to recall all the information. I just have a couple more questions to get as many symptoms in as I can to figure out what’s going on is that okay?”

“I was told he just passed out. Is it more than that?” Burt inquired, thankfully giving Kurt’s brain a chance to catch up.

“We just need to be sure there isn’t another reason before we release him. I like to be as thorough as possible.” Doctor Berns simply stated before turning his attention back to Kurt. “If it becomes too much for you let me know and we can take a break.”

“We can keep going.”

“Great. So chest pain, fatigue, any shortness of breath?”

“Yes … I just noticed it was bad today, but I thought … well I didn’t think much of it. “ Kurt stated not wanting to give away too much personal information.

“And what does it feel like?”

“Flips and then my chest feels like someone is squeezing on the inside.”

“Are you experiencing any dizziness?”

“Yes, mostly when I’m tired or I stand too quickly or move to fast”

“Kurt you didn’t tell me you were feeling like this?”

“I didn’t think it was serious.”

“You did a wonderful job Kurt. I would like to preform some x-rays and scans and other tests to get a better look as to what might be going on if that’s okay?”

“Yes please, whatever it takes to make sure he gets better” Burt insisted.

“What do you think it is?” Kurt inquired softly finally finding courage to ask.

“It could be a number of things, some things more serious than others. I don’t like to say what it is until I know for sure. For now you will need your rest before we begin to prep you for the tests and we would also like to keep you over night for observations.”

“Thank you doctor” Burt said standing from his seat. Doctor Berns nodded shaking his hand and walking out after informing Kurt he will be back shortly.

It was silent for a few moments as both of their minds caught up to what just happened. Burt finally let out a held breath and squeezed Kurt hand letting him know that Burt would never let anything happen to him and he was going to come out okay. After their short moment Burt cleared his throat awkwardly.

“Alright I’m really sorry kiddo, but I need to run home and grab the insurance card and maybe grab us some decent food. Do you need me to get you anything?”

“My pajamas would be wonderful actually.”

“Of course. Did you want me to stay for the testing or-“

“Just hurry back so I can have some pants on and maybe softer socks to wear. Oh and can I have my phone before you leave?”

“Sure thing.” Burt smiled handing him his phone from a bag of his belongings that were on him when they took him in. Before leaving Burt gave him a quick awkward kiss on the forehead, like he used to do when Kurt was really young, “I’ll be back as quick as I can. I love you.”

“I love you too Dad, please be careful though. And nothing too unhealthy, we still need to be careful about your heart.”

“You just worry about getting yourself better.”

Kurt wasn’t sure if he was ready to make up and apologize to Blaine yet but he was scared and needed his best friend here with him. If they were running tests then it probably isn’t as simple as Kurt thought it would be. He rang Blaine twice and got no answer which either means Blaine doesn’t have his phone on him, is on a date or hanging out with his boyfriend, or he is purposely ignoring Kurt’s calls. He sent a quick message telling Blaine to call his phone when the Nurse entered with a reassuring smile.

“Alright Kurt, I’m back. I’m just going to administer some medicine to help you feel a little more comfortable and relaxed. You should feel a warm feeling wash over you. If it begins to hurt please let me know immediately.” She gave Kurt the most serious face she could probably muster, which made him assume many people didn’t speak up about their pain. Though he himself is guilty of doing that.

“I will. When am I going to be tested?”

“Once the x-ray room is free I will wheel you over and someone, I think Chester is in today, will take an x-ray of your chest and then after that we may have to do an MRI. Do small spaces make you uncomfortable?”

“No.”

“Great. If at any time you feel even a little bit nervous about the MRI I can give you something to help calm you down. Do you have any questions for me?”

“When can I go home?”

Kurt watched her closely. Her smile faded for a small moment, she probably got this a lot working in the pediatric section of the hospital.

“It all depends on how the tests go. But we are doing everything we can to get you home safely and soon.” They really liked to stress the point where they were working hard for Kurt. Kurt just wondered where this kind of concern and hard work was when he mother was sick. “Is there anything I can get you to make you more comfortable? More blankets? And extra pillow?”

“I’m fine, thank you.” That warm feeling was starting to make him feel sleepy again and he had to fight to keep his eyes open.

“Go ahead and rest for a bit. We will wake you when it’s time. If you need anything at all just press this call button and I will be right in.”

The tests were easy for Kurt; he really didn’t have to do much, turn this way or that way, stay still, that kind of stuff. They were done fairly quickly. It was mostly waiting for his turn that took the longest. It’s just that Kurt was so exhausted. As they wheeled Kurt back into his room he saw his Dad there nervously waiting for him. “Kurt, how did it go?” Burt asked as he jumped up to greet him.

“Fine, I guess. I don’t know.”

“Kurt did a wonderful job. The doctors are looking over the results as we speak and as soon as they come to a conclusion as well as a plan of action Doctor Berns will be in to speak with you both.” The nurse explained allowing Kurt to rest for a second from his father’s concerns.

“Plan of action?-“ Burt started to inquire.

“Thank you Hannah. I should be okay now. I promise to call for you if I need anything.” Kurt said interrupting his dad before his started to freak out. She quickly made sure everything was set before leaving the two of them alone. Kurt let out breath trying to calm his own nerves.

“Kid, this sounds serious. I have the right to ask questions.” Burt corrected.

“Dad, I’m scared and I just need you, you’re all I have, and if you freak out that means I have to be the one who doesn’t freak out and I’m tired-“

“Okay, okay. You’re right. I promise it’s all going to be okay.” Burt reassured quickly squeezing Kurt’s hand to help him calm down, “Look I brought you your pajamas that you wants. I even grabbed some of your stuff from you desk. I just picked the ones that looked the most used so I’m sorry if I brought the wrong ones.”

“Thanks Dad.” Kurt smiled and felt himself slightly calming down. He was still scared, but his dad was here.

“Do you need help getting uh changed or-“ Burt awkwardly asking looking at the wires and tubes and everything now attached to Kurt.

“Dad I’ll be okay, just uh close the curtain…please.”

Burt nodded closing the curtain and giving Kurt the privacy he asked for. Kurt carefully stood up, his legs feeling shaky and weak. To help stabilize himself he held onto the side of the bed. Just from this movement he was feeling out of breath. He carefully pulled his pajama pants on, not bothering to tie them since he was becoming more tired with more movement. He decided against putting on his shirt partly because on the wires on his chest, mostly because he was already feeling dizzy and out of breath. “Dad-“ was all he could huff out and that’s all it took Burt before he tore open the curtain and helped Kurt back into the hospital bed with reassurances that he was okay. He gave Kurt some water and gently brushed his hair out of his face.

“Are you hungry? You haven’t eaten yet and maybe that will make you feel better? I brought you your favorite. Nutella, peanut butter, and banana sandwiches.” Burt rushed out reaching into the lunch bag and pulling out some sandwiches.

“Dad that hasn’t been my favorite since I was eight.” Kurt corrected as he rolled his eyes.

“Fine, I guess you don’t want it then. I could just go get you a tuna salad sandwich from the vending machine down the hall.” Burt mocked pretending to put the sandwiches away.

“I never said I didn’t want it.” Kurt defended as he reached out for a sandwich and quickly taking a bite. With all the nerves and stress Kurt never realized how hungry he actually was.

“How is it?”

“Good. Thank you.”

“Carole actually made it for you.”

“Carole?”

“Yes. She and Finn actually wanted to come, but I told them you were too tired for visitors and that you will be home tomorrow.”

“That means the whole glee club probably knows by know.” Kurt commented not sure if he was dreading them knowing or kind of glad.

“I’m sorry kid. I had to tell them. They are family now.”

“I know dad, I didn’t mean it like that. I just-“

“I know you’re a very private person and just worried about it getting around the school.” Burt interrupted.

Kurt didn’t want to really mention he’s just embarrassed about fainting in public and having to stay in the hospital for it. This did remind Kurt to check his phone for a call back or a reply from Blaine. He was disappointed there was nothing from him, but he was even a little more shocked when he didn’t see any messages from any of his old friends in glee. They probably didn’t even really want to be friends with him. They were all probably glad he was gone and not hanging around of them anyway.

His sulking period was quickly interrupted when Doctor Berns and someone else, probably another doctor or specialist, entered the room in a hurry. Burt immediately stood up in a way that made Kurt worry.

“Kurt, I have your results back.” He quickly stated. Kurt kind of missed his nurse asking how he was feeling first before getting into business. “And I’m not going to beat around the bush with it.”

“Is something wrong? Can I go home tomorrow?”

“I’m very sorry Kurt. It’s very uncommon in someone so young. The chances are so low we called in several other specialist and debated on running the tests again.” He paused looking at the pad in his hands. “Kurt you have a thoracic aorta aneurism, which basically means that the part that pumps blood from your heart to the rest of your body, which is located in the chest, is bulging. In normal situations all this means is that it would need to be monitored. However, the size of the aneurism is larger than it should be for that kind of treatment. We are going to need to preform open chest surgery to replace the damaged section of the aorta with a synthetic tube.” He paused to file through his papers, “I know you have a lot of questions but we really need to go over the paper work first so we can get Kurt scheduled for surgery. So Mr. Hummel if you would please follow me to where you can fill out the proper paper work, I can answer all the questions you have along the way.”

Kurt’s ears are left ringing, or maybe it’s all the machines he is currently hooked up to, and his heart plummeted into his stomach. Open chest surgery. His first thought was the horrible scar that it would leave him. But immediately after he began to think of everything that could go wrong. He was starting to feel his sandwich churn in his stomach threatening to come back up. The doctor would be back any minute with his Dad to go over the complications of the surgery. His life may never be the same after this.

None of it was fair to Kurt. He thought he would get good karma for keeping his feelings a secret and supporting Blaine in his new relationship. Why did this stuff always have to happen to him? Weren’t heart problems supposed to happen to people who were a lot older?

One of the machines next him to began to beep rapidly as he soon felt the world tilt again as he slipped away like before, except this time he was already laying down and there was a group of nurses rushing to his side.


	2. BlainePOV

Blaine isn’t sure how he was going to approach Kurt, in all honestly he wasn’t even sure if he really want to, he just knew he had to do it if he ever wanted to keep his friendship with Kurt. The one thing he was sure of was that he always wanted Kurt in his life. Kurt was like no one he has ever met or seen before, but in the best way possible. Kurt is a rare miracle in his life; Blaine exactly doesn’t have the best track record of good friends, which is why he is still very upset over Kurt not supporting him, because before this Kurt had always supported him.

Blaine also knew that it didn’t help that he had ignored all of Kurt’s calls and text messages. Blaine was just so upset and Jeremiah had advised him to just hit ignore and delete the message without looking, reasoning that Blaine needed to show Kurt that he was really upset. Not that Jeremiah knew what the fight was really about, and at the time Blaine was thankful Jeremiah had not really asked. All he really did was suggest something a little more intimate to help Blaine feel better, and if Blaine really thought about it making out in his car in a private area or Blaine’s empty house was all Jeremiah was really interested in. But Jeremiah was Blaine’s first boyfriend so he didn’t think too much of it.

Despite all this Blaine figured that if Kurt was ready to apologize he should at least hear him out. Another part of Blaine figured he should apologize to Kurt too for the horrible things he said in the heat of the moment.

Blaine made a quick stop to grab Kurt’s usual grande nonfat mocha as a peace offering before heading to school to meet Kurt at his locker like he did everyday. When he got there he was surprised to find that Kurt wasn’t at his locker. Kurt was extremely punctual, almost to fault, and had to keep to his routine or, according to Kurt, his whole body schedule would be thrown out of whack. Part of Kurt’s routine was that he would be at his locker exactly fifteen minutes before homeroom, leaving extra time to fix any hair, eyebrow, or skin emergencies. It was also routine for Blaine to greet him at his locker ten minutes before homeroom so they could walk together and catch up on anything they didn’t get to cover the night before when they usually spoke on the phone. Him and Kurt used to talk so much, if they weren’t hanging out together then they were usually texting or on the phone.

Blaine stood there awkwardly waiting for another five minutes before heading to class and tossing out the coffee cup with the cute, now stupid looking, I’m sorry written on the side.

It wasn’t until lunch that Blaine was able to talk to everyone who had given him odd looks during the day. He first assumed it was because of the fight he and Kurt had, but Kurt wasn’t in school today so that might not be it. He finally had it when he sat at the end of the table and everyone stopped their conversations to look at him.

“Alright what is it?” he asked with an annoyed tone. He couldn’t take this on top of fighting with Kurt.

“We’re just wondering what you’re doing here?” David finally asked

“What do you mean? I have a fight with Kurt and suddenly I’m not allowed to sit with you?” Blaine snapped poking at his food and trying avoid their looks.

“We just thought you would have taken the day off-“ David attempted to say before being cut off.

“Why would I take the day off?”

David open and shut his mouth a couple times before looking to Wes. All the other warblers were looking down trying to avoid Blaine’s glance now. He couldn’t believe them. One fight with Kurt and they aren’t even trying to hear his side, they just automatically take Kurt’s side.

“Blaine,” Wes started softly, slowly, cautiously “you did hear what happened to Kurt right?”

“Wh-“ Blaine started but couldn’t finish, “something happened to Kurt?” he thought out loud scared to know the answer. He had just seen Kurt, he was fine, and there was nothing wrong.

“Blaine, we all thought he texted you-“ David started again taking over glancing at the others who now had sad looks.

“He didn’t say anything” Blaine rushed out; it was true Kurt hadn’t said anything … just to text him back. He thought it was so Kurt could explain his side or apologize or something. He never would have thought something happened.

“I’m sorry to be the one to tell you this. I really wish you found out another way but Kurt, he’s um…” David stopped unsure looking to Wes again who just nodded for him to continue. “He is in the hospital and he’s very sick. I don’t know details but after he apologized to us for leaving us short one person for the competition, he told us he won’t be finishing the school year with us.”

Blaine thought he was going to be sick. He sucked in a shaky breath. Kurt didn’t look like he was sick when he last saw him, maybe he didn’t notice since he was so busy making out with Jeremiah in empty parking lots and going on dates in dark empty movie theaters. But Kurt never said anything about not feeling well, but maybe he thought Blaine wouldn’t listen. Maybe he wouldn’t have he is just realizing now that he was basically ignoring Kurt and the more he thought about the more he realized how quiet Kurt has gotten.

Blaine finally looked up trying to hide his fear, “Kurt told you guys this?” he was a little hurt he would tell them over him.

“Well not exactly. Principal Mullens told me that Kurt would no longer be with us in the Warblers. Then of course I spoke to everyone. I would have told you as well but I assumed you knew already being so close to Kurt,” Wes clarified. “Anyway this prompted Jeff to text Kurt, which he signed from all of us.”

“We’re planning on visiting him when we get the okay from Mullens. We already sent him some Dalton sweats and some activity books as a get-well gift. Trent thought we should preform but some of us think it could be against hotel policy-honestly the vote was split,” Nick rambled, “you can come with us if you want.”

Blaine sat there dumbly staring at his food he no longer wanted. Kurt no longer being in school with him meant missing so much. No more Kurt to pass notes to in the hallway. No more Kurt to share the latest glee club gossip with. No more Kurt to split food during lunch when they can’t decide which one they want. He shared his entire life with Kurt, before Jeremiah they did everything together. Then Blaine shoved him aside, and oh was he an awful person. Kurt was suffering and Blaine was ignoring him.

“Blaine, I’m sure Kurt will be okay. The doctors are going to take care of him-“ David started trying to break Blaine out of his stupor.

“They don’t know him,” Blaine answered, with no anger, cutting him off.

“Not like we do, but they know him medically inside and out. They know how to take care of him.” David responded doing everything he could to comfort his friend. “Plus, you know better than anyone that Kurt is strong, and a fighter.”

“I want to see him.”

“Blaine, they aren’t going to let you see him if he’s having surgery.” Wes tried to rationalize.

“You don’t understand. I-I” Blaine stuttered, he couldn’t even put what had happened into words. He hurt Kurt and now Kurt was sick.

“Okay, Blaine I can drive you and we can go see him together,” David finally gave in, “we can at least drop off his gift if they don’t allow us to see him.”

Blaine nodded silently still in shock of the news pushing his tray away from him. Coming into school Blaine had no idea what he would say to Kurt to fix their friendship, but now he was just speechless. He wanted to see Kurt but how would he even be able to face him. He yelled at Kurt and then ignored his calls and texts.

The guilt really ate away at him the rest of the day. The warblers tried to distract him with asking for help with wrapping the present and writing the card but his mind was in other places. David ended up driving Blaine to the hospital and getting Wes to come along to hopefully get the staff to talk medical to him. Blaine could tell both Wes and David had tons of questions for him as they shared glances between each other, silently communicating.

“He tried to call me and I ignored it.” Blaine finally admitted quietly looking out the window.

“Blaine-“ Wes started

“No we fought and I said horrible things and he tried to call and I ignored him twice,” Blaine snapped, “so please don’t try to make me feel better.”

“You’re just upset because you know he loves you-” David dropped.

“David!” Wes interrupted getting him to immediately shut up.

The entire car was silent. Blaine could not believe what he just heard. Kurt loves him? What was that supposed to mean.

“When did you two because such best friends that he suddenly tells you everything?” Blaine pouted a little jealous and hurt that it feels like to him Kurt is keeping secrets from him.

“He didn’t tell me. Nick did, Trent saw Kurt draw hearts around your name and teased Kurt about it and it turned out to be true. He told Jeff who told Nick who told me. I’m surprised you didn’t know, everyone else knew. We thought you were flirting with him and then you-“ David yammered on until he was interrupted by Wes.

“David stop talking, you’re making it worse.” Wes hissed rolling his eyes before turning back to Blaine, “Blaine, please listen to me. Kurt didn’t want you to know and we promised we wouldn’t tell okay. Kurt trusted us, but this blabbermouth couldn’t keep his mouth shut. You have to promise not to say anything.”

Blaine finally looked over to Wes thinking for a second, but nodding in a silent promise. He couldn’t believe Kurt loved him. It just made everything so much worse and confused him even more.


	3. Blaine POV

It’s been four days and he still hasn’t heard anything from Mr. Hummel. He couldn’t wait any longer he needed to see Kurt. Even if Kurt wasn’t up for visitors or just doesn’t want to see Blaine he needs to make sure Kurt is alright, that he is at least alive. He still doesn’t even know what Kurt was sick with or what kind of surgery he had. He understands that Kurt likes his privacy but he is Kurt’s best friend and he should know these things.

It all seemed like a good idea to visit Kurt without Mr. Hummel’s permission. Until he actually got to the hospital and the woman behind the reception desk smiled, gave him a pass, and directions to Kurt’s room. Now he is standing dumbly in the gift shop trying to pick out a stuffed bear for a gift that equally says get well and please forgive me. He finally decides on the small bear in the yellow hospital gown before heading over to the elevator. He really should have planed out what he would say to Mr. Hummel before heading over here like an idiot. It was too late now the elevator dinged and the doors opened to a quiet floor. There was one family walking to a room with a young girl and a couple of nurses at their stations. Blaine isn’t sure why he is suddenly so nervous and unprepared to see Kurt.

When he arrives to room five it’s dark and quiet. From the window he can see a shadow of an outline in the bed, Kurt, and in the chair next to him is Mr. Hummel reading a newspaper. Blaine moved to the door and was startled at the speed Mr. Hummel looked up. He gave a quick glance to Kurt before moving to the doorway and motioning Blaine to step out of the room. “I-I … I’m sorry” he stuttered, nerves getting the best of him.

“For what?” Mr. Hummel responded, honestly wondering.

“For coming without your permission I don’t mean to disobey or-“ Blaine nervously rambled.

“I just wanted to talk out here because Kurt’s sleeping. You’re allowed to visit him. You got a pass right?” he clarified giving Blaine an odd look.

Blaine nodded “I just-I was”

“It’s okay. You were worried. It’s nice to know that he has friends who are worried about him. I’m sorry for not contacting you like I promised.” “He was moved out of the ICU just yesterday and he hasn’t really been awake longer than ten or fifteen minutes now.”

“Is he okay? Can I see him?” Blaine asked quickly and hopeful.

“He’s tired and needs his rest but I’m sure he wouldn’t mind seeing another face besides mine or the doctors. But I need to warn you Blaine.” He paused glancing in the dark window, “He doesn’t look good. The surgery was successful but it was major and he is still recovering. He is hooked up to a lot of machines and stuff. He has some major stitches. It’s going to be hard to see him like this.”

“I can handle it” Blaine rushed out not fully thinking it all through.

“Okay. Try not to wake him. I will be right down the hall making a phone call.”

“Thank you.”

Blaine slowly, carefully walked into the dark room, where the only light was coming from one of the monitors. Oh was Mr. Hummel right. In no way was he prepared to see Kurt like this. There were so many more wires and tubes than Blaine had first imagined and peeking above Kurt’s thin white hospital gown was a painful looking set of stitches that would leave a decent scar. Blaine unconsciously touched his own chest before tearing his eyes away from the thick black lines that stood out on Kurt’s pale skin. Blaine was almost convinced he had the wrong room, this person looked nothing like the Kurt he knew. This Kurt was small, thin, his skin wasn’t glowing like it normally did, and his hair wasn’t perfectly styled but hung limply in his eyes. Blaine reached out a trembling hand to push Kurt’s hair out of his eyes, but froze before actually touching Kurt. He slowly took a seat in the chair Mr. Hummel was seated in, holding onto the stuffed bear rather than Kurt.

Ever since Blaine had found out Kurt had liked him or loved him or whatever he couldn’t stop overthinking every interaction with Kurt, wondering where signs were that he had so obliviously missed. Blaine had always been attracted to Kurt. It was obvious that Kurt was a very attractive guy but Blaine was still confused if that meant he liked Kurt or not. Kurt was-, is-, Kurt is something very special to Blaine. Blaine never had a best friend before. Their friendship meant having the world to Blaine. That is why he cherished and valued Kurt and his relationship with Kurt so much. 

Blaine wasn’t sure if he should talk or not. Not that he even knows what to say. So he sings, never raising his voice above a low soft whisper the hum and beeping of the machines as his only background music. He hopes it will soothe Kurt rather than disturb him.

There are places I remember

All my life though some have changed

Some forever not for better

Some have gone and some remain

All these places have their moments

With lovers and friends I still can recall

Some are dead and some are living

In my life I’ve loved them all

 

But of all these friends and lovers

There is no one compares with you

And these memories lose their meaning

When I think of love as something new

Though I know I’ll never lose affection

For people and things that went before

I know I’ll often stop and think about them

In my life I love you more

 

Though I know I’ll never lose affection

For people and things that went before

I know I’ll often stop and think about them

In my life I love you more

 

In my life I love you more

As he finishes the last line he can feel a prickle of tears in his eyes and he longingly wants to reach and hold Kurt’s hand as further reassurance that he is still here and, according to Mr. Hummel, will be okay with time.

He feels a silent buzz from his pocket and takes a quick glance, feeling kind of thankful for the distraction. However, as soon as he see’s Jeremiah’s name he immediately hits the red “ignore” button. He doesn’t really feel like talking to him right now, and as desperately as he wants to be mad at him and blame him for the entire thing Blaine can’t quite do that. That doesn’t mean Blaine hasn’t ignored Jeremiah all week because he has, though he isn’t positive why. He just knows that ever since he found out Kurt has a crush on him he hasn’t felt a pull towards Jeremiah anymore.

He begins to slowly reach out to hold Kurt’s hand when there is a soft knock on the door and he immediately retracts.

“Blaine,” Mr. Hummel addresses extremely softly for a man with such a gruff voice. “I’m sorry to cut you visit short, but the Nurse needs to check on Kurt and uh … clean him up.”

Blaine knows there are more to those words of what the nurse needs to do, but he also figures he doesn’t really want to know all the details that involves.

“I understand.”

“If you want to wait out in the lounge until she is finished you can.” Mr. Hummel offers.

“Thank you but I should probably be reporting back to the other guys, I left them wondering if Kurt is okay.” It isn’t a total lie. The Warblers had asked him to tell them everything he could. Blaine just conveniently left out the part where he was the most worried about Kurt.

“Thank you for coming today. I’m sure Kurt would have appreciated it. I’m sorry he didn’t wake up to at least say a quick Hi,” he apologies as he starts to walk Blaine out. Blaine pauses and pats Kurt’s hand softly as a goodbye.

“It’s okay-“ ‘It’s not like I would have known what to say anyway’ he adds the last part silently in his head before asking “Would it be alright if I stopped by tomorrow?”

“As long as your parents don’t mind I’m sure Kurt would love your company.”

“Thank you Mr. Hummel.”

On his way Blaine places the stuffed bear on the far table out of the way of the nurse and Kurt’s wires and machines.

Blaine begins to feel drained on his ride home. He hasn’t felt this emotionally drained since after his attack. When he gets home and sees Jeremiah waiting for him in his car all the energy he had left leaves him immediately. He is in no way ready for this.

“Where have you been? I’ve been texting and calling you for days now.” Jeremiah began his attack the second Blaine met him over by his car.

“I’m sorry.” Blaine said defeated and tired, he really didn’t have a good reason or excuse.

“You’ve ignored me for days and all you have to say is ‘I’m sorry’” Jeremiah answered almost shocked. And yeah Blaine probably deserves whatever he is ready to dish out. “What did baby-face Kirk convince you it’s okay to ditch me? I thought you two were fighting anyway, did he really come crawling back begging for your attention that quickly?” Jeremiah laughed, ready to forget Blaine ignoring him rather quickly.

This caught Blaine attention, Blaine was ready to be fought with and yelled at but going after to Kurt is not okay. “His name is Kurt and you know nothing,” he warned.

“What did someone die or something?” Jeremiah asked attempting to laugh it off and dismiss Blaine. Blaine had to fight the tears in his eyes as the thought of almost crept into his mind.

“Kurt is really sick and he’s in the hospital.” Blaine wasn’t sure why he didn’t just explain that from the beginning, but now that it’s out there all he wants is someone to comfort him. From experience with venting to Jeremiah about his fight with Kurt he knows he won’t get that from him.

“Alright fine. I’m sorry.” Jeremiah apologized in a huff. “Let’s just forget everything and go catch a drive in.” He casually suggested turning back to his car. Blaine was frozen with no idea what was even happening. Suddenly all he could see was everything Kurt was saying to him, how Jeremiah never takes on dates and tries to avoid being seen with Blaine in public places.

“Why haven’t I met your friends or family? Why haven’t we been on one date?” Blaine finally asked the questions he feared the answers most to.

“Blaine-“

“No I feel like I’ve been stupid and blind. You don’t see me as your boyfriend do you?” Blaine wasn’t angry and it was less of question and more like a spoken realization.

“I’m sorry if I have mislead you in anyway. I’m not out like you Blaine. I’m glad you can be out and proud but I’m not ready for that yet. I like having fun with you.” He explained honestly.

It scared Blaine a little bit that this wasn’t turning into a fight and that he wasn’t more heartbroken over the whole thing. He was blindly head over heels for Jeremiah and now it’s all shattered but he doesn’t feel much pain from it. He’s upset but he doesn’t feel like his world crashed like when he found out Kurt was in the hospital. “I guess we are looking for two different things then.”

“I’m sorry this didn’t work out like you wanted Blaine. Good luck with your friend.”

It stung a little bit that Jeremiah took everything, including Kurt being ill, so casually. Maybe Kurt was right and Blaine didn’t know what love was. He was obviously blind to the kind of person Jeremiah is, not that he really even knew a lot about Jeremiah; just more stupidity on Blaine’s part.


	4. Kurt POV

Kurt doesn’t remember waking up on and off after his surgery but they tell him that he did. The first time he wakes up the point of awareness he freaks out. There are wires everywhere, he is cold, nauseous, and his dad isn’t there. He will later be embarrassed that he is crying but right now he is scared and just wants his dad. He isn’t sure what happens. The nurse calms him down and promises to get his dad but he needs to not touch anything. He wasn’t aware that he is talking. He stays awake until his dad is by his side and then sleep takes him over once again.

The amount of time Kurt is awake gradually increases from five-ten mines to ten-fifteen minutes and so on. It begins to annoy him because he isn’t able to retain or get much information in ten minutes. He isn’t sure how long he is asleep for so he doesn’t know what day it is. It all just causes him major confusion that he doesn’t like.

When Kurt stays awake for almost half an hour the next time he wakes up he is in a different room. It’s quieter and isn’t as busy. He still has his own set of busyness and noise from his own monitors, tubes, IV’s, and wires. His dad is there in the room with him, but he is asleep on too small a sofa. His mouth is dry and he feels heavy. His chest hurts a lot but in a different way than it did before. He debates if he should press the call button. He decides against it because he figures it will take too much energy and he is already feeling tired again. It isn’t much longer before he lets his eyes fall shut and he is again asleep.

The next time he doesn’t fully wake up, but he hears a pleasant voice singing to him. He wants to open his eyes and see who it is and tell them he is okay because they are singing to him like he died. ‘Did he?’ He starts to wonder, but the softness of the voice lulls him back to sleep. ‘Blaine’ he thinks, ‘it sounds like Blaine,’ as he drifts back feeling comforted in the fact Blaine came to see him and sing to him. He fights to listen till the end of the song because it’s so pretty. He really does try to open his eyes but he just can’t, it’s too much of a fight. He at least hopes he is smiling to let Blaine know he is happy he’s there with him.

He wakes up again and for once doesn’t still feel exhausted to the point of falling right back to sleep. He must have a weird expression on his face because his dad is giving him a weird look. “Kurt?” He says softly and Kurt isn’t sure what his tone is or what it’s supposed to mean. Kurt goes to speak, but instead clears his throat harshly. “Wait, wait let me get you some ice chips to help with that.” His dad isn’t gone very long. When he returns with the ice chips he has a surprised look on his face as well as a nurse with him.

“Kurt it is wonderful to see you a little more alert,” she says with a warm smile, “are you in any pain?”

Kurt swallows a few ice chips before he tells her his chest is a little sore.

“That is normal, I’ll see if I can get you anything for that and maybe today we can remove the catheter.”

Kurt smiles at her brightly, because yes that will be wonderful. He feels them more now that he was made aware of them. She nods as she takes a few notes and numbers down before she scurries out.

Kurt eats a few more ice chips before speaking again, “How long was I asleep for?”

“You were in and out for a few days. This is the most awake you have been since the surgery. I was really worried about you even though everyone kept telling me it was normal.”

“Were you here the whole time?” Kurt asked a little shocked.

“I promised I would stay kiddo. Besides I couldn’t leave you even if they dragged me out of here.” Burt declares as he places a gently hand on Kurt’s shoulder.

“Thanks for not leaving me Dad.” Kurt smiles feeling a more calm than he had before. He then remembers someone singing to him, he isn’t sure how long ago that was though. He knows it wasn’t his dad because his dad’s voice isn’t that pretty.

“Did anyone stop by?” Kurt tries to keep his voice casual and innocent.

“Oh!” Burt exclaims as he immediately pops up out of the chair and rushes over to the table under the small television that had the sports channel on mute. He brings over a large bag and gently places it within Kurt’s reach. Kurt’s face must be comical because his dad chuckles lightly as he sits down.

“Wha-?” he starts surprised “What is this? Did you put this together?”

“No, some of your Dalton school friends dropped this off for you when you were in surgery,” Burt explained with his hands up in defense before adding, “I am really liking this school if it gave you friends like these guys.”

“Yeah they are good guys.” Kurt couldn’t believe everything that was in the bag. It seemed endless. There were soft Dalton sweats; bamboo socks; a soft comforting blanket; a squishy pillow; an assortment of healthy snacks including: ginger tea, coconut water, organic cookies, a protein bar, peppermints, and other health snacks; beauty products such as dry shampoo, butter oatmeal soap, shea butter oatmeal lotion, mint lip balm, pain relieving cream; and of course lots of entertainment variations such as the latest vogue, other magazine, and puzzle books.

Kurt couldn’t believe his eyes; he was covered in gifts and tissue paper. It looked like his dad was in a state of shock as well. As Kurt pulled out a card that had fallen to the bottom of the bag his Dad had collected everything in a neat pile and cleared off the bed. Kurt smiled a little teary as he saw all of the warblers had signed the card and obviously fought for space to write their personal get-well messages. He scanned the card over again looking for Blaine’s message but there wasn’t one. Maybe he had dreamt about hearing Blaine. Maybe he didn’t come sing and forgive Kurt. Kurt’s smile faltered a little as he handed his dad the card to put with the over-large-extravagant gift.

Kurt’s overthinking was interrupted by a set of nurses and Doctor Berns briskly entering the room. “Kurt, Mr. Hummel, please forgive us for taking so long. We were dealing with an emergency on another floor. Diana explains to me that your chest is a little sore?” He questions taking a look at Kurt’s stiches.

“Just a little,” Kurt answered quietly.

“Okay, well it is normal so no need to worry, but we can give you something to make you feel more comfortable if you need. We will need to wait a little bit before you are given more medication.”

“It’s not too bad” Kurt clarified not wanting to complain too much. The nurses start to record numbers on a chart, as he looks Kurt over.

“That’s good. You look like you are healing wonderfully. It’s nice to see you awake and alert. I want to keep you here another full week,” he begins to explain to both Kurt and his dad, “We slowly begin getting you more active with some occupational and physically therapy. Then if everything continues to look good after the week I will release you. You will have another one to two months of home rest with lots of follow up appointments. You will need take it easy for a while, which will be harder to do when you have more energy.” He finishes writing a couple more quick notes before turning to the nurses.

“Let’s go ahead and remove the catheter,” he directs to them before turning back to Kurt and his dad. “I’m sure you will be a lot more comfortable without it.”

Kurt smiles nervously worried it will hurt. His Dad gives him a reassuring pat on the shoulder before stepping out the room giving him privacy. The younger nurse begins to wash her hands and put gloves on and the older one talks Kurt through the process of what will happen. She also assures him it should be painless. He lays still and slightly embarrassed as the nurses do their work removing the catheter. The older one reminds him to let her know if there is any pain. The younger one begins to distract Kurt talking about what he is looking most forward to once he is out of the hospital. Kurt is grateful for distracting conversion and for her not asking about school or friends or family. Sooner than Kurt expects it’s all over. They smile and directly dispose of the bag and other objects.

“If you keep being this wonderful you’ll have all the nurses fighting over you.” The older one winks as the younger one let’s his dad know to come back in.

When his Dad enters he starts for the chair next to Kurt’s bed, where he was sitting before, but pauses and heads back over to the table where he originally picked up the gift from the warblers. 

“I forgot about this one,” Burt said. Kurt couldn’t see what his dad picked up off the table from where he was. Kurt paused confused when Burt handed Kurt the soft stuffed bear in the blue hospital gown. “That Blaine kid was holding this when he came back to see you. He was really worried about you, he couldn’t wait until you woke up and contacted him.”

“Yeah. Blaine’s a great guy.” Kurt answered unsure what to think of the bear. Blaine had come to see him, but did he really sing? It was hard to figure out what really happened and what he dreamt and imagined.

“He’s also too polite for his own good. He was so worried I would be mad he came to see you. He wouldn’t stop calling me Mr. Hummel. I didn’t have the heart to correct him and tell him to call me Burt.”

“He probably wouldn’t have called you that anyway.”

“He looked like one of those kids who needs to be overly respectful to adults. At first I thought it was just the uniform.” Burt joked.

Kurt’s heart felt like it sped up, but for a completely different reason. Blaine was worried about him. That meant that he forgave Kurt right? As Kurt tried to push all his intimate questions about Blaine out of his head another group of people entered his mind.

“Um Dad … did uh anyone else come visit me?” he asked hesitantly afraid to know the answer.

“Carole came by a couple times to check on you and get as much information from the other nurses and doctors that she could. She made sure you have had only the best staff taking care of you.” Burt casually answered. Kurt knew that was sweet of her. She had been trying so hard for Kurt’s love, it must be because she is afraid Kurt feels like she is a replacement mother, which he doesn’t. Kurt just isn’t used to having a mother anymore.

“Um I meant-“

“Oh” Burt realized out loud his eyes widening before his face reading remorse and a hint of anger. “No one from McKinley. I’m not sure I would have let them in anyway. I never liked how much drama they all cause. It would stress you out and-“ Burt started rambling getting emotional, something Kurt was not used to seeing.

“Dad- Dad. I’m okay now, we came in time for them to fix the problem.” Kurt reassured attempting to comfort his dad as best as he could.

There was a small moment of silence as Burt reached and held onto Kurt’s hand tightly speaking all the words he struggled with. Kurt settled into his bed before turning his head to the television feeling a little tired but wanting to stay awake.

“So who’s winning?” he asked in a tired voice. Burt laughed shaking his head.

“Do you even know what sport is on?”

“You’re trying to be interested in things I like. I thought I could do the same.” Kurt clarified fighting a yawn.

“You just worry about resting up and getting better.”

Kurt nodded letting his eyes close and falling back into a lighter sleep.


	5. Kurt POV

It was another two days before Kurt had heard from and seen Blaine. After he woke up from his nap the afternoon he opened his gifts he sent a quick message to Blaine letting him know he got the teddy bear and he was ready for visitors, but hadn’t heard anything back from Blaine or really anyone else. And with all this free “resting” time Kurt has had nothing to do but to over think the situation. Kurt never really got over the whole Valentines Day serenade. He was really hurt that day and he couldn’t even go to the one person he trusted with his secrets. The warblers were nice and supportive, especially since most of them were rooting for Kurt and Blaine to finally get together, but he was too embarrassed to fully confide in them. Kurt used to talk to the girls from McKinley about this stuff and they would eat his feelings out with him, but Kurt has become the outsider and they had grown too busy for him. It was silly to even believe that Blaine would feel that way about him. Blaine was everything that was perfect about the world and Kurt was … well he doesn’t even have a proper working heart, that’s how much of a mess he is.

After thinking about the relationship he had with Blaine Kurt had a couple choices to make: he could force himself to move on from Blaine as a crush, and be happy for him; could force himself to move on from Blaine as both a crush and a friend, and not be happy for him; or he could continue to have this unrequited love with Blaine and never get over him. Kurt just hoped Blaine still wanted to be his friend, even if he sometimes wonders if Blaine is only his friend out of pity or charity. It’s the only reason he really even has friends. At least having friends, even out of pity, made his Dad happy and that was something very important to him.

Kurt was in the middle of reading a magazine the warblers left when he heard a soft knock on the door. He was surprised to see a very timid and shy looking Blaine standing there.

“Hi” he said quietly.

“Hi” Kurt greet just as quiet, still surprised Blaine was here. After two days of nothing Kurt was sure Blaine was done with him and now he is here.

“Can I come in?” It was so hesitant that Kurt thought maybe he was in an alternate universe with a different Blaine.

“Uh yeah … sure” he said as he nodded to the empty seat next to him. His dad was back at the shop for an hour to take care of a few things, but he promised he wouldn’t be long. Blaine sat down awkwardly and stiffly and played with his hands not really looking at Kurt.

“Did you get gift the warblers left for you? We left it with your dad to give to you,” he asked still not really looking at Kurt. Maybe the tubes and wires freaked him out, Kurt thought trying to give him the benefit of the doubt.

“Yes, it was more than I expected,” Kurt answered before rushing out “not that I expected anything.” He took a calming breath trying to force himself not to be so nervous. “ Tell them I said thank you. It meant a lot to me”

“I will.” Blaine finally looked up at Kurt with a small smile. “Wes wanted me to tell you that the sweats they put in there should be washed inside out and to either hang dry or on the gentle cycle. And David wanted me to remind you that they are sweats and are for relaxation purposes so it shouldn’t matter how you wash them.”

Kurt let out a small laugh, shaking his head fondly, “tell Wes thank you and remind David all clothes should be washed properly no matter their function or purpose.”

Blaine snorted but nodded silently telling Kurt he would be sure to tell them and went back to playing with his hands when the conversation lulled.

“um … how are you feeling?” he finally asked quietly, and really who was this? Blaine was never this shy and quiet and timid.

“Tired mostly. My chest is a little sore and sometimes my stitches are a little itchy,” he answered honestly. “But, I’m still here so I shouldn’t complain” he laughed out. He turned his awkward laugh into a cough when Blaine winced. 

“Kurt I was so worried about you. I am so sorry, you tried to tell me you weren’t feeling well and I wasn’t listening and then –oh god- I ignored your calls-“ Blaine was growing more hysterical the more he talked.

“Blaine- Blaine!” Kurt cut him off. Yeah Blaine was sorry, but he was only sorry because Kurt was in the hospital. “You were mad at me. You didn’t know.”

“That’s no excuse for ignoring you Kurt” Blaine cried putting his head in his hands.

“I deserved for acting that way, but enough of this. We’re both sorry and I certainly forgive you …” Kurt started trying to get Blaine past his hysterics.

“Kurt – you … “ He stuttered in shock before taking a deep breathe and uncertainly reaching for Kurt’s hands, flinching when he felt the IV in his hand, but shaking it off before continuing looking directly at Kurt. “You have nothing to apologize for. I was a jerk who said awful things to my best friend-“

“We’re still best friends?” Kurt asked in shock.

“Of course we are still best friends. We had a fight and sometimes best friends fight, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to be your friend anymore.”

“I –I … after you didn’t pick up your phone or text me back I just thought …” Kurt started but trailing off feeling stupid and silly.

“I should have never ignored your call. It was wrong for me to do.”

Kurt bit his lip and looked away reminding himself Blaine was only saying this because Kurt was in the hospital.

“Kurt,” he started grabbing his attention again looking worried. “I’m not just saying this because you … you’re in here. Even if you were just calling to apologize or tell me off more I should have picked up no matter what.”

Kurt stared at him wondering how he knew what Kurt was thinking. He cleared his throat finally pulling his hands away. “Well either way I should have supported you. I promise to be supportive of your happiness from now on.”

It was now Kurt’s turn to not look at Blaine and avoid his worried look. He instead made himself interesting in picking at his blanket. “So we’ve missed a lot of days. Catch me up with you and Jeremiah. Did you tell him?” Kurt still was unable to say love, it hurting his heart in a different way than before.

“Uh … no I didn’t tell him” Blaine answered slowly.

“Oh well maybe we should come up with a good way to tell him. I know he wasn’t too impressed with you singing in public so maybe something less public this time. I know how much you love 80’s romance comedies maybe borrow something from there?” Kurt suggested really trying to prove to Blaine he wants to be a better friend and support him.

“I don’t want to talk about Jeremiah right now. I just want to go back to us being best friends again.”

“Oh well … um we could catch up on the latest celeb gossip?” Kurt suggested picking up a magazine.

“I would love to” Blaine smiled widely.

Kurt carefully slid over patting the bed next to him. Blaine looked unsure at first but then softly took the space close to Kurt. Kurt forced himself to move past the idea of having Blaine so close and how good he smelled by pulling all his focus into the page. It wasn’t working all that well for him. He had almost forgotten how much he missed having Blaine around, even as just friends.

“Blaine?” Kurt asked so quietly that he was surprised Blaine even heard it.

“Yeah?” Blaine responded looking up from the magazine.

“Thank you for visiting me before I was awake.” Kurt wished he had the courage to look at Blaine when he said this.

“How? How did you know?” Blaine asked genuinely surprised.

“I um … I heard you singing to me, which was also very kind of you to do. It was comforting. I just wasn’t strong enough to wake up I guess.” Kurt explained still looking at the magazine.

“You heard that?” Blaine asked still shocked. And Kurt finally looked up.

“I wasn’t in a coma Blaine I was just resting.” Kurt probably shouldn’t sound so arrogant, but Kurt thought Blaine knew he wasn’t in a coma.

Luckily Blaine had let out a small chuckle shaking his head, “I’m glad you enjoyed it. Have the New Directions given you a performance yet?”

“I um …” wow this was awkward, how should Kurt explain how pathetic he was, “I don’t think they are. I haven’t heard from any of them even before I was in the hospital. I know Finn knows and Dad said he came by when I was still sleeping with Carole but other than that I haven’t heard much.”

“Kurt I –“

“It just means a lot to me that you’re here visiting me. I was running out of things to talk about with my dad. I can only explain so many musicals to him so many times.” Kurt cut him off attempting at another lame joke to get Blaine off the subject. Except now Blaine was staring at him, which feels way worse. It was getting uncomfortable and awkward until Blaine finally spoke again.

“Can I ask what surgery it was? You dad didn’t want invade your privacy and you don’t have to tell me but-“

“I need a valve to my heart replaced.” Kurt rushed out. “My chest was hurting me for a while and I was tired but I just thought I was stressed. Then I started getting dizzy spells and I had trouble breathing, which I assumed was just something related to what was going around school. Then I collapsed in the Lima Bean and well yeah.” 

Blaine was uncomfortably quiet and Kurt wasn’t used to people worrying about him, he doesn’t know what to do with it. Does he thank them or just dismiss it?

“But you’re okay now right?” Blaine asked interrupting Kurt’s thoughts.

“That’s what the doctors are saying. I have to spend another three or four days here and then I get to go home and rest for another month.” Kurt explained trying to read Blaine’s expression. He just didn’t understand the look he was giving him. It wasn’t uncomfortable or even pity. Before either of them could speak again a nurse came in. “Oh Kurt it’s nice seeing a new face in here.”

“Hi Hannah, this is Blaine my friend from school.” He greeted thankful it was her and

“Blaine it’s very nice to meet you. If you both don’t mind I need to check up on Kurt.”

“Oh should I step out?” Blaine asked getting out of the bed.

“You won’t be in my way and Kurt doesn’t need to do anything but sit there so you can stay.” She smiled making her way to the other side of Kurt checking the machine. “Feeling any different Kurt?”

“Bored” he responded.

“Well thank goodness you have Blaine to entertain you.” She looked over and winked brightly at Blaine with a smile. “Well everything is looking good. I’ll be back later, Kurt. And Blaine?” She asked turning her attention towards him “Don’t let Kurt force himself to stay awake because he’s “bored with sleep”.”

“I’ll do my best.”

It wasn’t much longer until Kurt started to slump down and blink more.

“Kurt?” Blaine asked worried.

“I’m fine, just sleepy. The medicine makes me even more tired.”

“You should sleep then.”

“I don’t want to.” Kurt whined fighting to keep his eyes open, “If I sleep then you will leave.”

“I promise to stay as long as I can and I come back everyday this week. We have too much catching up to do anyway, but you need your sleep so you have more energy.”

“Okay” Kurt smiled letting his eyes fall close. The last thing he heard was Blaine softly humming a familiar tune.


	6. Blaine POV

True to his word Blaine stayed until they kicked him out. Kurt woke up for a brief period of time before he had to leave thankfully. He was starting to feel somewhat less guilty for the whole thing, but he didn’t help himself by not telling Kurt that he and Jeremiah weren’t together anymore. Were they even together in the first place? He was honestly so confused by everything he tried not to think about how embarrassingly head over heels he was for Jeremiah. He was stupid and he should have just listened to Kurt rather than fighting with him. That’s what he should say. It’s what he needed to say, but when Kurt talked about being a more supportive friend the words had froze in his throat. Kurt was the good friend, he is the best they come if you ask Blaine, and he let him believe otherwise.

“Blaine are you even listening to me?” Wes snapped annoyed. No, Blaine wasn’t listening; he was too busy sorting out his feelings for Kurt.

“Wes of course not, I have stolen almost half his food and he hasn’t noticed.” David chimed.

“Are you still upset over this Kurt thing? I thought you two moved forward?” Wes asked getting the warblers attention on the subject now. Had everyone known about Kurt’s crush on Blaine?

“Yeah well I didn’t exactly tell him everything.” Blaine mumbled, still upset with himself.

“You didn’t tell him you love him?” David asked poking him in the arm.

“I don’t love him … well maybe. I don’t know. It’s weird he’s my best friend.”

“You can love your best friend Blaine.” Jeff clarified sliding over to join the conversation.

“Okay, but how do you know when you love them as more than a friend?” Blaine asked. It was all very complicated.

“Why don’t you ask Kurt what it feels like?” David joked, earning a glare from Blaine and elbow from Wes. “Just saying, he knows what it feels like. He would be able to explain it best. Maybe it will lead to something.”

“You’re not being helpful.”

“No, I think David might be right. You need to just start talking and see where it goes. Tell him about what happened with Jeremiah and why you thought you were in love with him.” Jeff added starting a debate among the table if Blaine should tell Kurt or not.

“He doesn’t like when I talk about Jeremiah, plus I still haven’t told him we were never anything in the first place and that I put him through all that torture for no reason.” Blaine whined putting his head in his hands as he let out a distraught sigh. “I’ve gotta go. I’m visiting Kurt in the hospital again. I promised to help him with his hair and skin today.” Blaine sighed as he stood up leaving his mostly uneaten tray of food for who ever wanted to pick at it. He heard a couple of them shout good luck after him, and to tell Kurt they miss him.

When Blaine arrived to the hospital he greeted the woman at the counter with a smile.

“Hello again Blaine. Here to see Kurt?”

“Who else,” he joked placing the visitor’s sticker on the right side his blazer and heading to the elevator. He knew the way to room as much as he knew he way around Dalton by now. Some nurses would recognize him and instantly greet him with a smile, others would just continue with there work as if he wasn’t there.

When he arrived at the room he Kurt’s dad in his usual spot next to Kurt, who was on his phone. Blaine was a little worried about the expression on Mr. Hummel’s face. Keeping his manners he knocked light on the door before entering, even though he has been told to just come in the last time he was there.

“Hi Blaine!” Kurt greeted smiling brightly as he put down his phone.

“Thank goodness you’re here. Kurt is driving me insane.” Mr. Hummel joked.

“Well I wouldn’t be if I was allowed to get up and walk around more. You don’t even let me hold my own water cup.” Kurt defended. “Anyway, I’m so glad you’re here my dad and I are sort of in a stand off. Will you please explain to my dad that the warblers are harmless and will be on their best behavior?”

“Best behavior for what?” Blaine asked hesitantly, worried about what they have been telling Kurt. 

“Wes texted me. Apparently they wanted to visit me as soon as I am out of the hospital. I’m surprised you didn’t know.” Kurt explained.

“I thought that was a surprise. They talked about it … well debated it.” He said thinking back to the meeting. “I guess Wes over ruled the vote on the surprise. He thought that you should never show up unannounced at someone’s house, even if it is under good intentions.”

“See dad! Gentlemen. Nothing like the sleepovers Finn hosts where they destroy the house.” Kurt exclaimed obviously getting bored with being stuck in a hospital with just his dad.

“Mr. Hummel,” Blaine cut in still seeing the nervousness on Burt’s face, “The warblers are extremely respectful to each other’s houses. Most of our mothers would have our heads mounted on Dalton’s walls as an example to all the other boys what would happen if we acted disrespectful at someone’s house. They also understand that Kurt is still recovering so they will probably just bring a bunch of movies and ask to see his stitches and scar.”

“They already asked for a picture.” Kurt clarified.

“I told them not to” Blaine responded annoyed they ignored his wishes to leave Kurt alone.

“It’s fine Blaine,” Kurt said reaching to hold his hand, giving it a quick squeeze before turning back to his dad. “Can I tell them that I will let them know when I’m up for it?”

“Alright, but maybe not a sleepover. The doctor said you will still need your rest.”

“Thank you” Kurt almost squealed with excitement, instantly grabbing his phone to text them back. Blaine was excited for him, based on what Kurt has told him about his other friends they weren’t really the greatest friends to have. He said he felt like the only reason he was invited places out of pity since he was there when they made plans. Plus they haven’t visited or even really contacted Kurt about being in the hospital, which even though Kurt tried to act uncaring, but Blaine could see that Kurt was hurt that they haven’t at least texted to ask if he was okay.

“And Blaine,” Mr. Hummel addressed with a serious expression, waking Blaine from his thoughts, “ I think you have hung around enough to call me Burt by now. I appreciate you being respectful or whatever, but let’s drop the formalities.”

“Okay, Mr. Hummel –I mean Burt- Mr. Burt!” Blaine rushed out oddly nervous blushing at his mess up. Both Kurt and Burt chuckled.

“We’ll work on it,” Burt settled with a grin before excusing himself to give them some time to hang out, promising to be back.

“So it looks like you have a lot of work for me,” Blaine said eyeing the numerous products Kurt had set out on his bed tray.

“You should feel lucky I even let you see me with my hair and skin in this condition.”

“Your hair and skin are fine, I mean your hair looks a lot different when it isn’t styled but there isn’t anything wrong with it. I think you look adorable.” Did Blaine just call Kurt adorable? Has he called Kurt adorable before?

“Adorable makes me sound like I’m five or six” Kurt joked, laughing nervously and blushing slightly. “Anyway so since I am unable to rinse we have a very limited amount to work with. I have some dry shampoo for my hair. My skin is just some wipes, toners, and moisturizers.”

“It feels like a high honor to be trusted with your hair and skin” Blaine joked reaching for the dry shampoo.

“I was desperate,” Kurt joked back, moaning as Blaine massaged his scalp. Now, it was Blaine’s turn to blush for reasons he is not entirely sure of.

“Blaine, you still haven’t caught me up with Jeremiah. I do promise to be supportive. I just need you give me a chance to try.” Kurt explained keeping his eyes closed as Blaine rubbed his scalp.

Blaine’s hands slowed and stopped as Blaine sat there feeling guilty for letting Kurt suffer from believing he was not a support friend even more.

“Blaine? You stopped” Kurt observed aloud opening his eyes, “The bottle says to massage until-“

“Jeremiah and I aren’t a thing anymore.” Blaine said slowly, cutting Kurt off.

“I’m so sorry.” Kurt apologized showing genuine sympathy.

“I’m not sure if we were ever actually a thing,” Blaine continued, he wasn’t heart broken but it did hurt that he was used the way he was.

“What do you mean?” Kurt asked confused and interested.

“You were right,” Blaine said feeling stupid for many reasons. “We were never in a relationship. He isn’t out like we are. He just wanted to have some fun and feel good.”

“Blaine I” Kurt stuttered unsure. “I didn’t want to be right, I never wanted you to get hurt,” he further explained.

“I know,” Blaine reassured. “Thank you for looking out for me, especially when I’m too blind to see the obvious.”

It was awkwardly quiet. Blaine wasn’t sure what else to say so he chose to wait out the silence, hoping Kurt would pick the conversation back up. He finally dared to look at Kurt, who was now refusing to look his way. Blaine couldn’t exactly read his expression, but there was a light blush on his cheeks. Blaine purposely chose to assume it was from his pain medication or something similar.

“Are you okay? You must be so heartbroken.” Kurt asked now worried facing Blaine aging, his eyes scanning Blaine’s.

Blaine opened and closed his mouth a few times trying to find the words to explain how he felt. “I’m surprisingly not,” he started, “I mean, yeah it hurts and I’m embarrassed and maybe a little disappointed, but I wouldn’t say heart broken. I guess I never really loved him, but maybe loved the idea of just being in love.”

After a second or two Kurt silently and hesitantly reached his hand over grabbing Blaine’s and giving a very light squeeze. Blaine wasn’t sure if Kurt was just being hesitant about holding Blaine’s hand, which he should never be because Blaine loves how it feels when Kurt holds his hand, or if Kurt’s strength just wasn’t in it. Either way Blaine gave a reassuring smile and gave Kurt’s a firm, but gentle squeeze back hoping it expressed that everything was okay.

“You know what would make you feel a thousand times better?” Kurt finally asked after he awkwardly took his hand away laying it back over his stomach, absent-mindedly picking at the blanket.

“What?” Blaine asked indulging Kurt.

“Finishing your promise of helping my skin and hair” Kurt declared shutting his eyes waiting for Blaine to begin again. 

Blaine let out a chuckle shaking his head. He wasn’t sure how Kurt always knew what to say to make him feel better or even make him laugh, but he is extremely glad they are back to laughing again.

“As long as you promise you’re not too tired or in pain,” Blaine negotiated.

“I promise to make you stop if I need more medicine or if I need to take a nap.” Kurt answered reaching to cross his heart but stopping when he felt the wire.

Blaine tried to not notice the IV’s and heart monitors, but sometimes it was unavoidable. It still hurt to see Kurt like this and to know that Kurt was scared before the surgery and might still be scared, considering he still has a long recovery ahead of him.

Blaine started on Kurt’s face, gently rubbing in the moisturizer after cleansing it with witch hazel. This time Kurt just hummed contently, his face muscles completely relaxing under Blaine’s touch. It was an extremely intimate moment for them, but it was easy for Blaine to relax like this with Kurt. Blaine had almost again slowed to a stop as he began to realize that maybe he has always been in love, but it wasn’t with Jeremiah, it was with Kurt.

Blaine awkwardly cleared his throat and began to awkwardly make small talk to distract his mind from wandering in that territory at this moment, “So you um … excited to go home tomorrow?”

“Well I only go home if my chart looks good, but I cannot wait to escape this place. You have saved my sanity by visiting me all the time, but hospitals still freak me out, especially at night when it’s silent except for the beeping” Kurt chattered continuously, explaining everything he hated about hospital.

And oh yeah Blaine was definitely in love with Kurt.


	7. Blaine POV

Blaine hadn’t heard as much from Kurt since he has been home. Blaine is excited that Kurt is finally home again, but he misses texting and talking to Kurt all day. He still visits Kurt daily; they usually go for a light walk around the block so Kurt can excursive and then watch project runway or real housewives to force Kurt to rest. There is still a lot Kurt is not allowed to do, but at least now he is out of the hospital. Kurt has been approved for extremely light chores or activities like folding laundry, but he is still restricted from lifting and raising his arms above his head. His moods are all over the place, the last time Blaine was over Kurt picked a fight because Blaine offered to get him something to drink when he was thirsty. Blaine did his best to calmly explain he was offering to be polite not because he thought Kurt was incapable of getting his own glass of water. Kurt still told him to leave. Two hours later Kurt called him extremely upset that he had treated Blaine that way and hesitantly explained that he hasn’t felt the same since the surgery. After some further research on his own part Blaine found that it was normal for recovery patients to feel depressed and have mood swings.

During all this time Blaine has done everything he can to not dwell on his new feelings toward Kurt but he wouldn’t be able to keep it quiet much longer. So he set up a plan. The warblers were finally getting to see their friend for an afternoon filled with movies. Blaine, with the permission and approval from both Burt and Kurt would be the only one staying the night. Then the next day Blaine would take Kurt out on an official date. He was forced to get a little creative because Kurt was on a strict diet and couldn’t stay out late, though Kurt would never admit it, he struggled to stay awake past nine or nine-thirty on most nights. By creative Blaine really means taking Kurt to their coffee shop and paying for a caffeine-free and diet friendly drink as he confesses his feelings for Kurt. Gosh he was terrible at this maybe he should get some input from the warblers? “No you need to do this on your own” Blaine scolded himself out loud before zipping his overnight bag shut.

He desperately wanted to be the first one to arrive to Kurt’s house, but between changing his clothes three times and giving himself two pep talks he lost track of time. By the time he arrived the rest of the guys were already munching on some snacks and deciding what movies to watch. “I hope you guys didn’t have Kurt serve you.” Blaine joked grabbing a pretzel from the bowl on the coffee table and taking a seat next to Kurt.

“Blaine, you know I’m allowed to do light activities,” Kurt warned rolling his eyes but cuddling into Blaine.

He purposely ignored the knowing look David was giving him and instead put his concentration at not sighing of relief from how right it felt to be this close to Kurt.

“Besides he had everything set out for us before we even arrived,” Wes clarified not hiding how impressed he was at Kurt’s hosting abilities.

“I’m not surprised, I have heard stories from Mercedes about how Kurt hosts the best slumber parties.” Blaine attempted to subtly compliment giving Kurt a gentle nudge.

“Did I miss the debate for which movie to watch?” He asked hoping he wasn’t blushing too much from his physical contact with Kurt.

“There’s no debate, we’re watching The Birds” Thad said trying to hide a small chuckle for some reason.

“No we aren’t,” Nick huffed giving a glare Kurt must have been proud of, “everyone here knows how much I hate birds, we are not watching that.” Nick clarified crossing his arms before daringly declaring “I will leave if you play that movie, and Kurt doesn’t want me to leave and since it’s his house and he says we aren’t allowed to play that movie if I don’t want to watch it-”

“Nick calm down,” David finally cut in “none of us even have that movie. They’re purposely tying to get your riled up. Besides we should watch Batman.”

“We always watch Batman, let’s watch something different for once.” Blaine complained.

“If I had known you guys would take this long to decide what movie to watch I would have started one before you got here so you didn’t get a choice.” Kurt sighed tired of their debate.

“You know we are just going to end up watching what you want to anyway so just start the movie, Kurt” Wes answered grabbing some of Kurt’s carrot sticks rather than pretzels. Blaine assumed it was out of courtesy; Wes was always polite like that. Kurt smiled and turned the television on relieving the DVD menu to ‘Moulin Rouge’, something Blaine couldn’t help but find absolutely adorable. 

Everything was going great, they laughed and sang to most of the songs, some of the guys even got up and did a dance number. Blaine could tell Kurt wanted to dance, but he did well hiding it. Blaine could also hear Kurt’s struggle to hold some notes without getting winded, but he was probably the only one close enough to hear Kurt’s shaky breathing after singing.

It was almost towards the end of the movie, closer to the part where Blaine would need to go find a box of tissues for his tears, when Finn came home with a couple of the other guys from the New Directions, stopping short when he saw all the warblers gathered around Kurt in the living room. “Oh hey. I uh didn’t realize you were going to have people here. I thought you were supposed to be taking it easy.”

“I’m sitting on the sofa watching a movie, and I have Blaine to hand me things. How much easier can it get?” Kurt responded annoyed and pausing the movie, giving everyone no chance to ignore what was happening. 

“Right. How long are they going to be here?” Finn asked awkwardly after one the other guys, Blaine couldn’t remember his name, pushed him to ask.

“I dunno, Dad mentioned them staying for dinner but not long after.”

Blaine could feel the annoyance radiating off of Kurt. He wanted nothing more than to try to comfort him, but that would be pushing things too far.

“They can’t leave earlier?” Finn asked also starting to get annoyed. It was like he was trying to send Kurt a secret message.

“Kurt we can-“ David started softly and gently

“No!” Kurt fumed, “you’re my guests and you can stay as long as you like.”

“Kurt you don’t-“ Finn started

“Go rehearse at Rachel’s house if that’s what this is about.” Kurt finished like he was trying to dismiss Finn.

Blaine was beginning to get worried. He wasn’t sure if it was okay for Kurt to get worked up like this, if his heart could handle all the stress put on it. Maybe Blaine should say something. Finn is still standing there with his gang, and now he was looking angry rather than timid. Some of the guys with him looked kind of angry too, though two of them looked more hurt than angry.

“I finally convinced Rachel you weren’t a traitor to our team and that they can finally come sing to you, but maybe I was wrong.” Finn spat.

The room froze right there, no one moved or said anything. Blaine could feel the hurt radiate off of Kurt. That was the question that had hung in the air ever since he was in the hospital. Why he hadn’t heard from the New Directions? He never said anything or even asked out loud but whenever Blaine kind of brought them up he would change the subject.

Kurt must not have been doing well at hiding the hurt on his face because one of the guys with Finn, he had very badly dyed blonde hair, Blaine really feels awful for not remembering his name, finally speaks up.

“Kurt, we don’t think-“ he tried to

“Please excuse me-“ Kurt interrupted, “I –I … I just need to be alone right now” he finally stuttered before rushing up the stairs, leaving everyone one else awkwardly hanging around in the family room.

It’s still silent for a moment. Blaine desperately wants to start a fight, because how dare someone make Kurt this upset. Then he regrets thinking that because he probably made Kurt this upset before. He also really wants to run after Kurt but he knows going up this soon will only cause him to be shut out, so he has no choice but to wait.

“Blaine should you go after him or something?” Nick finally asks, which isn’t a surprise, when someone is upset Nick wants to help no matter what.

“He’s too upset right now, it will only makes things worse.” Blaine explains ashamed that he can’t go fix this.

“Don’t act like you know him,” one of the other guys snaps at him.

“Excuse me?” Blaine asked offended and fuming.

“Finn told me all about how much you continually hurt him, so don’t act like you know him. You know nothing. ”

It takes all of Blaine’s energy not to punch the guy. He opens his mouth to argue back but David’s voice fills the room instead.

“How dare Blaine? You’re joking.”

Blaine knows David is only beginning, because like Blaine, David has known Kurt from day one when he first showed up as a spy. David was the one to point out how much Blaine flirted with him, which has nothing to do with this. However, he also knows more of why Kurt transferred, not as much as Blaine does, but more than some of the other warblers.

One of the other guys opens their mouth to speak, but David does not give him any sort chance.

“Kurt came to us, because you sent him away from a group project. He was ignored and invincible, but Blaine noticed him from the beginning. Ever since then Blaine hasn’t left his side. He was there for Kurt to have a shoulder to cry on without making it about his troubles. He was at the hospital everyday, and when he wasn’t there he texted Kurt non-stop. It was endearing, but annoying after the first class. Blaine has been there through all of Kurt’s recovery and you want to accuse him for not knowing Kurt well enough to know when Kurt needs comfort and when he wants to be left alone, even when Kurt says he wants to be left alone?”

“Kurt’s like a girl, he doesn’t really mean he wants to actually be left alone, he just likes a scene” he dismisses obviously bored of the argument.

“Puck” Finn hisses a warning, and Blaine wants to role his eye because Finn has also called Kurt a girl on multiple occasions. It’s quiet for a moment and then utter chaos of several arguments erupt at once.

Just as Blaine escapes to Kurt’s room he hears Burt shouting, demanding to know what was happening.

Blaine heart deflates when he see’s Kurt curled up on his bed, pulling at his sleeves trying to hug himself. He is facing the opposite wall so Blaine can’t see his face.

“Kurt-“ he breathes because he doesn’t know what else to say. He knows better than to ask if he’s okay.

Kurt turns slowly, not uncurling himself, and locks his wet eyes with Blaine. They are having a silent conversation, Kurt unable to verbally speak and Blaine not knowing what to say. Kurt’s eyes tell him how much pain he is in and Blaine hopes his are expressing that he’s here for him, for everything he needs.

Blaine awkwardly clears his throat before finally saying, “I’m so sorry.”

It’s honestly all he can say.

Kurt nods, his eyes welling up as he sniffles. There is a soft knock on the door and Burt enters, and Blaine can see the similarities of Kurt and his father. They way they both try to push down their anger for someone else’s benefit. It was the same look Kurt had when Blaine would talk about Jeremiah, the anger before the hurt.   
“I sent them all home”

It was quiet and defeated, something strange to Blaine’s ear coming from Burt.

“Can Blaine still stay?” Kurt asked hopefully, yet with a wet scratchy voice.

Blaine wanted to kiss Kurt right there. It said it all. That Kurt really has forgiven him and that he still wants Blaine around. Blaine honestly feels so privileged to see Kurt like this.

Burt looks Blaine up and down before nodding and leaving the room. 

“You want to talk about it?” Blaine hesitantly asked after Kurt uncurled himself to wipe the drying tears off his face.

“Not really,” Kurt answers, the hurt still in his voice. He let out a frustrated huff before continuing, changing his mind.

“It was hurtful when I didn’t hear from anyone before the surgery, but I was too nervous about it to really dwell on it all. But after, I … it’s silly, but I really thought they would come and surprise me with a song,” he took shaky breath before continuing, the tears welling in his eyes again, “To find out the only reason no one even contacted me because they considered me a traitor. And they know why I left, they- they-“ he cut off shaking his head unable to further explain

Blaine without even thinking strode to Kurt’s bed pulling him into a hug. After Kurt began to settle down after several moments, Blaine finally spoke again.

“You missed David almost turn Incredible Hulk on Finn and his friends.”

Kurt let out a wet chuckle; pulling back from the hug Blaine had him in. Blaine smiled reassuringly, pausing before instinctively reaching out to swipe away a free tear rolling down Kurt’s cheek. For a second it was as if everything was frozen, Blaine considered kissing Kurt right there. It seemed like a good moment maybe he should go for it.

“Blaine?” Kurt asked quietly, whispering for some reason. Blaine snapped out of his trance, looking back up at Kurt’s eyes, not even knowing when he started to stare at Kurt’s lips.

“Yeah?” He whispered back, hoping he didn’t sound as nervous as he was.

“My chest is starting to hurt a little,” he again whispered, letting out a tight breath.

“I’ll go run and get your medicine from your dad?” Blaine asked, but not waiting for Kurt to nod in response.

So not the appropriate time to think about kissing Kurt, maybe they weren’t having a moment. Was this how Kurt felt when Blaine was overly touchy-feely to him? He isn’t positive how he even keeps screwing up like this. He just hopes that tomorrow will go well and then he could finally stop over thinking and analyzing situations … well situations over if Kurt still likes him enough to be his boyfriend.


	8. Kurt POV

When Kurt wakes up his throat hurts. That’s what reminds him that even when things begin to look brighter nothing can go right for Kurt. For a second he thinks he will cry again but as his breath hitches he feels a pair of arms tighten around him. At first he pauses letting his mind catch up. He carefully looks next to him and there is Blaine clung to him like a koala bear. Kurt never imagined he would be the type of person who enjoyed cuddling in sleep, but nothing has ever felt so right before. And maybe he is a little over heated, but all he feels is wanted, needed, and protected. He knows it feels right, like this is where he is supposed to be forever.

Kurt lets himself relax into Blaine’s arms for another moment before reminding himself that it isn’t real. He reminds himself that Blaine doesn’t actually love him, and that Blaine is only a little extra clingy than usual because he feels guilty about Kurt being in the hospital, even though it isn’t even his fault. Kurt needs to be smart about how he removes himself from Blaine’s four limbs, because as much as he wants to stay there forever he knows he can’t, that even though it feels right it isn’t right. So he carefully removes himself from Blaine’s limbs, replacing his body with a pillow, and pretends the whole thing never happened.

After his morning shower routine and getting dressed, he began to moisturize and tone his face, but pauses with the vitamin e oil in his hand, staring at the scar on his chest. He has been so caught up in trying to get back to his normal life he never really thought about the surgery. There was something inside him that wasn’t actually a part of him. It’s synthetic. It’s fake. Kurt was anything but fake, he did everything he could to be his true self and now part of him, part of his heart wasn’t real, wasn’t human.

“Kurt?” Blaine asked, sleep still heavy in his voice, pulling Kurt away from his thoughts.

“I’m okay, just trying to reduce the scar as much as possible. I didn’t mean to wake you.” He apologized, forcing a reassuring smile on his face.

“You didn’t, I’m glad you’re feeling better. Sorry if I was a bed hog last night.”

“No-no, you were fine.”

“Okay”

It was awkward, why was it awkward? Kurt forced his eyes away from the awkward staring contest they were unintentionally having. He cleared his throat as he buttoned up his loose grey shirt the rest of the way, and tucking in his scarf.

“I’m just going to head down stairs and let you get ready-“ Kurt rushed out walking towards the door, forcing his mind not to think about how cute Blaine looked when he first woke up, or how he sounded or that he would be getting undressed in his room.

“Okay, Kurt are you sure you’re-“ Blaine started but was cut off by Kurt again.

“And don’t worry about making the bed. I’ll get it once you’re dressed.” He said with finality rushing out of the room and down the stairs.

He hears the rest of his family in the kitchen, specifically his dad mumbling to Carol, probably still half asleep, and Carol humming in response. When he enters the kitchen they both wish a good morning one brighter than the other, but both meaning well.

“How are you feeling?” Carol asks not taking too much attention away from the stove.

“I’m feeling well, thank you.” He responds grabbing both his medicine and his dad’s before beginning to set the table for breakfast. It wasn’t their usual morning routine, but Carol wanted the whole family to eat healthy together, so meals became more of a family time than they used to be. He only just got to setting the plates when Blaine came down looking like perfection, not a single hair out of place. Kurt doesn’t even realize that he stopped midway to stare at Blaine until his dad grinned and nudged him.

“You alright with that plate, Kurt?” He smirked.

“Huh?” Kurt responded before breaking out of his trance, “Oh I’m fine dad.” 

Without hesitation Blaine took some of the plates from Kurt’s stack to set the other half of the table, while wishing everyone a good morning.

“Did you sleep well, Blaine?” his dad asked politely, giving Kurt a knowing look the whole time. Kurt just wished his dad would knock it off. Even if Blaine is completely oblivious it’s impossible not to notice the look his dad has on his face.

“Very well, thank you for asking” Blaine smiled brightly and the light must have been going dim in here because for a moment he could have sworn he thought he saw a light blush creep onto Blaine’s cheeks, but he must have been mistaken.

“I know it’s probably not the most delicious breakfast I’ve made, but the scrambled egg whites, whole grain toast with almond butter and bananas will be ready shortly,” Carol stated breaking Kurt from another trance he was stuck in, “we’re trying to all become a little healthier.”

“It sounds wonderful, thank you for making breakfast.” Blaine responded still being polite as ever, “my family doesn’t really eat meals together … it’s nice that you make time for each other.”

It was quiet, Carol giving a look like she found a lost baby animal that needed some love and his dad was trying to telepathically speak to Kurt. Kurt never heard much about Blaine’s family; just that Blaine knew they loved him and that was really all there was to say. It seems like everyone is too busy to make the time for each other. He wondered if it made Blaine feel alone the same way Kurt felt at his old school.

“Well Blaine there will always be a place at the table for you here” his dad promised as Carol pulled out a seat for emphasis. Blaine sat down with a bashful smile and Kurt took the seat beside him giving his hand a squeeze. There was still so much he needed to learn about Blaine Anderson.

Before the moment could last any longer he heard Finn run down the stairs, making it just in time for breakfast, as usual. Carol rolled her eyes and mumbled something about heavy feet under her breath, placing a plate of egg whites with spinach and tomato’s and whole wheat toast on the table, grabbing the almond butter and sliced banana before taking her seat.

“Good morning Finn you know where you cereal is,” Carol said acknowledging Finn’s presence, her tone making it obviously that she was not only knew about Finn’s actions last night, but she was not pleased with them either.

“Finn decided that honey nut cheerios are just as heart healthy, but the commercial promises it.” Kurt explained to Blaine so he wouldn’t feel left out.

“Actually I think I’ll just grab a plate of what you’re having, if that’s okay?” Finn sheepishly asked.

Kurt studied Finn as Carol handed him a plate with scrambled egg whites. No actual words were spoken, but Kurt knew that Finn must have felt guilty for last night and this was a good enough apology for Kurt.

“So Blaine, what’s the plan for today?” Kurt asked after taking a sip of his orange juice.

“Nice try Kurt, but I already told you it’s a surprise.” Blaine said giving Kurt a side smile and a nudge.

“I’m sure my father would like to know where I will be” Kurt bantered.

“Just have him back by curfew Blaine, and make sure he sticks to the doctors orders.” Burt instructed.

“I would never put Kurt in any harm, and I will be sure to have him home in time for dinner.” Blaine reassured.

After breakfast Blaine and Kurt had tried to clean the dishes since Carol cooked, but she insisted they get started on their day. It didn’t take too much of a push for Kurt to leave the house given it would be first time he went out other than to various doctors’ appointments.

Kurt had blushed when Blaine had open the car door him and smiled graciously when Blaine let him have control of the music. Kurt soon figured out that they were going to Dalton, which should not have been much of a shock since he knew the route well enough by now.

“Why are we going to Dalton, Blaine?” Kurt asked suspiciously.

“Okay, it wasn’t the original plan, but after you fell asleep last night The Warblers started texting me and they really wanted to surprise you.” Blaine explained sounding a little off.

“I don’t know Blaine-“

“Please Kurt, they are really excited about this,” Blaine pleaded pouting his lips a little.

It really wasn’t fair that he looked that cute. “How did they get into Dalton on a weekend anyway?”

“I already told you when we first met” Blaine smiled bright, and it really wasn’t fair that Blaine could be so good-looking and cute at the same time.

Kurt just eyed him curiously instead of responding. Blaine took a quick glance when Kurt didn’t say anything and quickly returned his eyes to the road.

“The Warblers are rock stars, remember?” Blaine answered with a wink.

“How could I forget?” Kurt answered breathlessly, remembering that day still filled Kurt’s stomach with butterflies.

Blaine quickly looked at Kurt, concern filling his face. “You okay? I’m not pushing you too much am I?”

“No, Blaine. I’m just really glad I met you.” Kurt honestly said, giving Blaine a reassuring smile.

“I’m really glad I met you too, Kurt.” Blaine smiled back, pulling into the parking lot.

He parked the car before giving Kurt what was probably supposed to be a very serious expression. “Kurt, please try to act surprised.”

“You offend me, doubting my acting skills?” Kurt said with mock shock making Blaine chuckle lightly and hold his hands up in surrender.

Blaine once again opened Kurt’s door for him and offered his arm as an escort … a friend, Kurt reminded himself. Just entering Dalton somehow made Kurt relax and let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. Even though Kurt didn’t suffer from bullying anymore he still felt comforted, protected, and safe in the building. The halls themselves gave Kurt reassurance and ease.

“Let me know if I’m walking too fast” Blaine requested, not letting go of Kurt for some reason that Kurt refused to read into.

“No, your pace is fine.” Kurt smiled, he didn’t like people fussing and worrying about him, but the fact that Blaine cared made him feel good.

“It’s weird being here when no one else is” Kurt whispered loudly.

“You don’t have to whisper,” Blaine laughed.

Kurt simply shrugged in response. “I didn’t think I would miss this place as much as I do.”

“No?” Blaine asked in a tone Kurt couldn’t quite place.

“As awesome as this place is, it just never felt like home to me. I always feel a couple steps behind everyone else here.” Kurt paused taking a glance at Blaine’s expression, Kurt didn’t mean to offend or hurt Blaine. “But, being here reminds me on everything I’m missing.”

“Well, trust me these halls miss you too. According to Nick your locker neighbors have been spraying hairspray just for the smell, since you’re not there to do it yourself.” Blaine teased lightly.

“I don’t use that much hairspray,” Kurt mumbled, but still felt himself snort a small laugh at the thought.

“Kurt” Blaine answered knowingly.

“Yeah well you’re one to talk,” Kurt retorted.

Blaine simply nudged him when he pouts, causing him to laugh lightly.

They are outside of the choir room when Blaine comes to a halt, turning and giving Kurt a serious expression. “Remember,” he whispers in a tone that sounds similar to the one his father uses before handing Kurt the credit card.

“Just worry about your own acting skills” Kurt whispers back.

Kurt is honestly surprised when the room inside is empty and Blaine had disappeared when he entered. He took a calming breath reminding himself where he was and that Blaine would never prank him this way. It wasn’t long before Kurt distant voices singing softly. Kurt should have known Blaine was a part of this, maybe even planed it.

They entered the opposite side of the choir room, nothing grand just walking in and parting, letting Blaine take his usual spot as the lead.

I walked across an empty land

I knew the pathway like the back of my hand

I felt the earth beneath my feet

Sat by the river and it made me complete

Kurt should feel flattered they are dedicating a song to him, but it felt like pity. They were only doing this because of how the New Directions treated and hadn’t sung to him like they probably assumed, like Blaine had asked earlier.

 

Oh simple thing where have you gone?

I’m getting old and I need something to rely on

So tell me when you’re gonna let me in

I’m getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

Honestly, Blaine was stunning as the lead. He always is. His voice did things to Kurt that just shouldn’t be possible. And no matter how beautiful he sounded Kurt felt pained. Pity was not something he ever wanted and Blaine never pitied him, always empathized and sympathized but never pitied and now he and the others pitied him through song.

 

I came across a fallen tree

I felt the branches of it looking at me

Is this the place we used to love?

Is this the place that I’ve been dreaming of?

Kurt pushed down the lump in his throat and begged that he wouldn’t start crying suddenly feeling embarrassed and exposed. He tried to focus on the emotion Blaine was putting into the lyrics and the passion the others held backing him up. They mean well, they think it’s right thing to do. They are trying to make him feel better and maybe this wasn’t Blaine’s ides. Maybe he was just going along with it for The Warblers who wanted to do something.

 

Oh simple thing where have you gone?

I’m getting old and I need something to rely on

So tell me when you’re gonna let me in

I’m getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

It didn’t matter what he reminded himself. They are making him feel the same way the girls in his old glee club made him feel when they dedicated religious songs to his dad. It was out of good intention, but it wasn’t wanted and only made him more upset.

 

And if you have a minute why don’t we go

Talk about it somewhere only we know?

This could be the end of everything

So why don’t we go

Somewhere only we know?

Somewhere only we know?

 

Kurt couldn’t freak out this time. He could not lose these friends too. He just needed to be appreciative. He forced a smile on his face as his eyes watered a little. They would at least believe that was moved by the song. When the song is done he will thank them all and then make an excuse for Blaine to take him home. He just hoped Blaine wouldn’t read through him and confront him about it.

 

Oh simple thing where have you gone?

I’m getting old and I need something to rely on

So tell me when you’re gonna let me in

I’m getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

 

And if you have a minute why don’t we go

Talk about it somewhere only we know?

This could be the end of everything

So why don’t we go?

So why don’t we go?

 

Ah-ah-ah

Ah-ah-ah

 

This could be the end of everything

So why don’t we go

Somewhere only we know?

Somewhere only we know?

Somewhere only we know?

Kurt took a deep breath to calm himself and gave Blaine a hug allowing him to hug back and the others to place reassuring hands on his shoulders. He thanked them in a small wet voice. They wished him well and they were quickly gone confirming his suspicion of doing this out of pity.

“So what did you think?” Blaine hesitantly asked when everyone was gone.

“Can you please take me home?” Kurt decided to ask rather than respond.

“Why? What’s wrong?” Blaine worried his eyes moving to Kurt’s chest and then back to his face.

“I’m tired” Kurt lied his voice getting smaller.

“Oh um sure, I was really hoping I could talk to you about something though. Could we do that first?” Blaine hesitantly took Kurt’s hands asking for permission.

Kurt just wanted to go home and be alone. He let out a breath before nodding.

“Thank you … um let’s go find somewhere where we can both sit down.” Blaine said leading him into one of the study halls, pulling out his chair for him.

When Blaine sat down Kurt did everything he could to give Blaine his full attention. Maybe he was upset about the performance, but he should hear Blaine out. Blaine’s been a good friend through the recovery process; he’s been patient and understanding. Listening is the least Kurt could do.

“I know it’s not the best timing for this, especially with the whole Jeremiah incident not too long ago-“

“Blaine I already forgave you for-“

“Please let me just say this before I lose my nerve?” Blaine pleaded.

Kurt nodded, now a little worried about where the conversation was going.

“Without you in school I realized how much I miss you when you’re not around and how much I love having you near me when you are. When you were in the hospital it was like a wake up call and suddenly the rest of me caught up to what part of me already knew from the very beginning. And I’m selfishly glad that because of it I will get to spend another year with you here … with me?” Blaine finished unsure, biting his lip nervously but not taking his eyes away from Kurt.

Kurt was frozen. Was Blaine saying what he thought he was say? It wasn’t fair. Blaine only liked him now because he felt guilty for putting Kurt in the hospital. His heart pounded as Blaine leaned in closer. Kurt would normally want nothing more than for Blaine to kiss him, it would normally be a dream come true. But it shouldn’t be happening this way. It would be over soon. It wouldn’t be healthy. So Kurt pulled away, looking down to avoid Blaine’s hurt expression.

“Please just take me home” he requested again.

“Kurt I-“ He started, voice a little strained.

“I want to go home” Kurt said, his voice firmer this time even though he was fighting tears.


	9. Kurt POV

Once he was home again, Kurt ran from the car and into his house before giving Blaine a chance to try to talk to him again. He just needed to be alone to think, to breathe. He immediately went up the stairs to his room, letting the door slam loudly behind him as he threw himself on his bed to cry. He instantly regretted slamming the door and letting whoever was home know he was upset. He thought it was his dad coming up the stairs, but the knock on his door was too hesitant.

“Kurt?” Finn carefully opened the door poking his head into the room.

Kurt was surprised that Finn even came up to see him, if he wanted to talk he usually waited for Kurt to initiate and come to him.

“Finn, whatever it is can it please wait? I’m sorry about how I acted last night but I just want to be alone right now.” Kurt answered trying not to sound like the mess he probably looked.

“I know you’re not okay right now. Do you need a doctor?” Finn innocently and nervously asked, allowing himself to get closer to where Kurt was.

“No, I don’t need a doctor. I just – it’s complicated and I know you don’t want to hear about it.” Kurt explained shaking his head.

“You listen to my drama with Rachel and Quinn all the time. Did The Warblers do something? Did Blaine do something? Cause if they hurt you in any way I swear I will not hesitate to-“ Finn started letting himself get riled up ready to fight.

“It’s not what you’re thinking Finn.” Kurt cut him off with a small voice. He felt silly now for getting this upset about the situation. “I never thought they pitied me. I thought they were my friends, but I guess I was wrong.”

“What do you mean pitied you?” Finn asked, taking a seat in Kurt’s desk chair.

“Blaine took me to Dalton today, as a surprise, and they dedicated a song to me.” Kurt started to explain.

“Isn’t that a good thing?” Finn questioned innocently.

“They only did it because they felt bad about what happened last night and tried to make up for The New Directions.” Kurt clarified. It was true. They were in the middle of Kurt and Finns argument about The New Directions last night. 

“I don’t think it was pity.” Finn finally added after a moment of thinking.

“Don’t try to make me feel better.” Kurt whined throwing his head onto his pillow dramatically.

“No, they were honestly excited to be hanging with you yesterday. And after you went upstairs they ripped Puck and me practically to shreds for what we said.” Finn stated trying to prove to Kurt that he was telling the truth. 

“Puck said stuff about me? - No never mind it’s better I don’t know is was said behind my back right now.” Kurt muttered.

“I was jealous and maybe Puck was too. Ever since you’ve switched schools you’ve been too busy for me. I was hoping when you got home from the hospital we would have time together but you’re always hanging out with Blaine. Burt says it’s cause you two have a lot in common and he seems to like your new friends better than your old friends.” Finn awkwardly rambled, not sure how to explain why he was so upset yesterday.

Kurt turned his head towards where Finn was sitting. He was shocked Finn was even admitting this. He thought Finn only hung with him before because his Dad asked him to. He only ever really hung out with Kurt at home, never at school.

“You were a real jerk to me last night” Kurt stated without any anger, just as a matter of fact.

“I know, but I am sorry” Finn answered shamefully.

“I know you are and I forgive you … “ Kurt started, biting his lip nervously before finally asking, “Is it true?”

“Is what true?” Finn asked, honestly confused.

“That they didn’t visit me because they think I’m a traitor?” Kurt continued, knowing there was not really a good enough reason to back down now. 

“Its kind of split. They all understood why you switched schools, well most of them did. But when you joined their glee club she thought you were doing it to get information or something for us, and when she found out that you actually joined and were competing she blew everything out of proportion as usual and then people took sides. She somehow managed to convince Puck that Blaine seduced you into competing against us.” Finn explained, avoiding telling exactly who took what side, but maybe he didn’t know for sure.

Kurt rolled his eyes, it sounded like something Rachel would do.

“But I don’t think anyone purposely didn’t visit you. Everyone probably just assumed someone else went for everyone.” Finn rushed to clarify.

“No, I understand. I guess I kind of am a traitor. I helped start The New Directions.” Kurt sighed beginning to feel tired from all his emotions.

“Dude, I don’t think you’re a traitor. You like singing so you should be in their glee club.” Finn shrugged like it was no big deal.

“It’s not like I get any chances to preform. They won’t even give me a solo.” Kurt complained.

“Really? Those guys yesterday said you have one of the best voices they’ve heard in their choir yet. One of them bragged that with more of their training you have an actual chance to succeed in show business.”

Kurt let out a small chuckle wiping away a stray tear. That sounded like something Wes would say. He loved bragging about their training and formalities. He took a deep breath before getting out of bed. “Thanks Finn,” Kurt smiled feeling calmer after talking everything out, “Since I never actually got my movie night or day out how about we go catch a movie before Carol and Dad get home?”

“Just as long it’s not like a French film or something” Finn yelled as he raced down the hall to put some shoes on before meeting Kurt downstairs.

On the way to the movie Finn eyed Kurt curiously when he didn’t sing along to the radio, but he didn’t question it, which Kurt was extremely thankful for. Even though the doctors had told him he could preform relatively normal activities that Kurt had done before he was nervous about overworking his heart. What if needing to fill his lungs with more air caused him to be back in the hospital? Kurt would eventually be over this fear. Maybe after the scar was less noticeable he would be able to work himself up to singing and dancing again. Besides he was still struggling to list his arms above his head. 

When they came home after the movie, Kurt was thankful that neither Carol nor his Dad asked questions about what happened with Blaine. They asked if he would be coming over tomorrow, but when Kurt said “probably not” the subject was dropped. They eyed his suspiciously at dinner, noticing something was off, but no one said anything about it. Instead they talked about mundane things, like what was coming up when the weekend was over tomorrow. Kurt tried to pay attention, especially since his Dad and Carole were partially talking about Kurt’s doctors appoints for the week. He just couldn’t get his mind off of Blaine. It was the fantasy he wanted to come true at Valentines Day, but never happened. It’s what he always wanted Blaine to say to him, but now it just stung. Blaine will soon be over his new found feelings towards Kurt once he was fully recovered from his surgery.

Kurt spent the rest of the night trying to keep his mind off things and to actually get a night worth of sleep. Ever since the surgery his sleeping pattern has been off and it wouldn’t help things if he couldn’t stop thinking about Blaine and how hurt he looked.

Monday morning came fast despite Kurt not being able to sleep most of the night. After his two doctors appointments Kurt found himself fighting to stay awake in front of the television, since when did he become his Dad? His head just started to nod forward when the doorbell rang. He carefully got up from his spot after turning the television off, telling his Dad who was in the dining room doing paper work for the garage he would get the door.

“Nick? Jeff?” Kurt gasped, surprised to see them here. He thought it was maybe someone from the garage or possibly Blaine.

“Can we come in?” Jeff asked.

“Yeah – of course.” Kurt said stepping aside and opening the door wider for them to come in. “Would you like something to eat or drink? I think I have some pretzels left from movie night.”

“That would be great” Nick answered with a smile, before getting nudged by Jeff “I mean, no thank you.”

“We’re here on business Kurt, not pleasure.” Jeff explained.

“Well then I guess we should have a seat” Kurt replied gesturing towards the sofa in the living room. They sat down and awkwardly looked at each other for a couple seconds before Kurt finally asked, “So what’s this about?”

“Blaine is miserable and though he didn’t tell us what happened we kind of figured it out.” Nick mumbled.

“You guys are all way too invested in my relationship with Blaine,” Kurt remarked with a slight snarkiness.

“Yeah we know,” Jeff added rolling his eyes. “But when we knew Blaine was going for it we were so excited, both of you were finally going to be happy.”

“We just want to know what happened?” Nick inquired.

“Did Blaine send you?” Kurt demanded, feeling the angry rise inside him.

“Blaine had no idea we’re here” Nick answered seriously, “We’re here because we are your friends Kurt and we were worried about you.”

“Well I’m fine” Kurt sneered, “so if that’s all there is-“

“Just tell us what happened, we want to help.” Jeff added sincerely. 

Kurt let out a huff in response getting ready to stand up and show them out.

“Please, Kurt?” Nick further requested.

Kurt was quiet for a moment, letting the fight drain from him. They were trying to be his friends, he should probably try to incase Blaine no longer wants to be his friend and he would be left friendless.

“Blaine only likes me right now because of my major surgery, once I’m better the feeling will be gone and then there is no way we could be friends again.” Kurt answered ashamed and embarrassed.

“I don’t believe that” Nick answered.

“Blaine has always liked you Kurt. He just didn’t know that. It sounds ridiculous but it’s true.” Jeff explained trying to get Kurt’s full attention, “Don’t shake your head, it is true. Blaine is never that friendly with his friends. You don’t see him cuddling with Wes or paying for David’s coffee.”

Kurt still didn’t answer, but he wasn’t ignoring them he was just trying to see what they were explaining.

“The heart thing was just kind of the push he needed, and thank goodness because I hated that Jeremiah guy, he was a prick.” Nick added

“Nick!” Jeff scolded

“Everyone else hated him too, I just have to guts to say it out loud.” Nick shrugged not even sorry.

“I appreciate what you guys are trying to do, I just … Blaine made it very clear at valentines day he didn’t like me and then all of a sudden now he likes me? I can’t risk getting my heart broken again. It’s for the better.” Kurt sadly explained. He wanted it to happen just as much as them but it wasn’t right.

“At least think about hearing Blaine out and talking to him about this?” Jeff requested.

“I’ll turn my phone back on and if he doesn’t initiate contact again, I’ll be the one to reach out.” Kurt suggested.

“Great!” Nick exclaimed with a smile, “now about those pretzels … ”


	10. Blaine POV

It was the perfect plan. So where did he go wrong?

Blaine was currently lying in his bed staring at the ceiling replaying everything over in his mind, trying to find where he screwed it all up. Everything was great. They had fun with the warblers, despite the little argument Kurt had with his brother Finn. But even with that the night was great, Kurt even cuddled with him when they watched ‘Moulin Rouge’. The next day he ended up having to change his plans of where to confess his feelings to Kurt because The Warblers wanted to preform a song for him, that they didn’t get to do when he was in the hospital. Kurt was touched and told everyone he really enjoyed it and thanked them for their performance. This was all great.

It was after when things went wrong. Blaine pulled Kurt aside into a quiet room and sat him down to tell Kurt about his new feelings towards him. He thought Kurt liked him, well according to everyone else Kurt was in love with him. However, Kurt got upset and asked Blaine to take him home.

And now Kurt won’t even speak to him, well he won’t answer his calls or respond to his text messages. It’s been almost a week and he has literally heard nothing from Kurt, no matter what way he tried to get in contact with him.

“Hey Blaine” Wes said as he softly knocked on the doorframe to Blaine’s bedroom. “I hope it’s okay I came up. Your mom let me in.”

“Sorry, I’m not really in the mood to discuss set lists.” Blaine sighed sadly, forcing himself to sit up from moping into his pillow.

“I’m not here for that. I came to see if you are okay?” he asked cautiously. He took a seat next to Blaine on the bed as he studied Blaine. Blaine wasn’t positive what he was studying Blaine for but it was the same look Wes had when his girlfriend was upset about her dog passing away.

“No, I’m not okay.” Blaine huffed, annoyed that Wes was even here to see if he was okay. It was partly his fault that this has even happened. If they didn’t encourage Blaine to confess his feelings he and Kurt would still be friends.

“Blaine, it’s not the end of the world-“ Wes started, trying to calm him down.

“This is exactly what I feared would happen, and if you and the other guys hadn’t pushed me to tell him about my new feelings we would still be talking.” Blaine snapped, taking out his emotions on someone else other than himself.

“Blaine, we’re sorry about that. We have said it a million times. Kurt was so head over heels for you we all thought it was going to happen and you would both finally be happy.” Wes explained matching Blaine’s tone.

“I was happy,” Blaine snapped, let out in a sigh, calming himself down before continuing. “I was happy and then everything got really complicated.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong, Blaine, except well …maybe your timing was a little off.” Wes added.

Blaine flopped back onto the bed with a groan, covering his face with his hands. “What am I going to do?” asking himself more than Wes.

“I really can’t tell you much because I don’t know a lot, but Nick and Jeff went to see Kurt the other day and according to them you two really need to talk things through.” Wes explained. 

“I tried to talk to him but he’s ignoring me. I tried calling, texting, I even messaged him on Facebook. And I’ve gotten nothing in return.” Blaine complained.

“You know how Kurt is. He needs his time and space with stuff like this.” Wes tried to reason. “I know you probably don’t want my opinion, but if you really truly like Kurt and honestly believe there is a future for you two I wouldn’t give up, but if you think this is just a crush you’ll be over soon just go back to being friends.”

“How do you know all this?” Blaine asked in an accusing tone.

“My mom’s a psychiatrist and my dad is a marriage counselor,” Wes answered with a shrug. “Anyway let’s get out of here and do something to get your mind off stuff, I can’t have you moping at practice anymore, it’s starting to effect our performances.”

Blaine let out a small laugh, “only if you promise not to talk about choreography or song choices.”

“If you paid better attention in the meetings I wouldn’t have to go over them with you” Wes lectured rolling his eyes mockingly.

On the way out Blaine called out to his mom he was leaving for a while. As he pulled the door open he came face to face with Kurt who looked like he was mid knock. “Kurt!” He exclaimed surprised.

“I uh …I” Kurt stuttered a little shocked and wide eyed.

“I’ll catch you later Blaine” Wes said awkwardly as he slipped past Kurt.

Blaine awkwardly stared a Kurt a while his mind only catching up the real world when Kurt cleared his throat, asking if he could come inside.

“Right – yes, of course.” Blaine answered stepping aside to let Kurt in.

“I’m sorry for not answering you before I just-“ Kurt started following Blaine into his living room.

“…just needed a little time?” Blaine finished as he sat down on the living room sofa.

“Yeah and I was going to call you back, but I thought it would be better to talk in person.” Kurt said shyly, as he fidgeted in his seat next to Blaine.

Blaine waited for Kurt to continue, but he seemed to loose his nerve so he picked things back up. “I really wanted to apologize for upsetting you.”

“No, I was wrong to react that way. I just … this is hard for me to say, but I have liked you for a long time,” Kurt started to explain looking at his hands rather than at Blaine, “on valentines day I thought you were going to sing to me, and then you … you”

“Kurt-“ Blaine whispered his heart catching in his throat a little from the guilt of causing Kurt any sort of pain. He had no idea Kurt thought that. He should have picked up on that.

“No please if I don’t get this all out I don’t think I can continue.” Kurt begged, looking at Blaine with pleading eyes.

Blaine nodded in response, silently promising not to interrupt.

“I tried to get over you when you started to date Jeremiah, it really hurt but I tried to push past it to be more supportive, to be a better friend. I kept telling myself that you would never see me the way - the way I saw you.” Kurt paused to take a deep breath, “And I guess I never got over you, which is probably why I reacted that way when you said those things. I know it’s only because of the surgery and my heart and eventually you would go back to just wanting to be friends, but if I let it happen and it turned out you didn’t really like me the way you thought you did I would lose you and I can’t lose my best friend that way.”

Blaine must have had stupid expression on his face because he could not believe Kurt still had feelings for him. It stung that Kurt thought Blaine only liked him because he felt bad for Kurt. Kurt was the best person he knows, he was everything.

“That’s … that’s all.” Kurt finished awkwardly still not looking at Blaine.

“Kurt I- I” Blaine stuttered still not believing Kurt actually like him.

“Did you mean what you said? That you like me?” Kurt interrupted, standing up and finally looking at Blaine.

Blaine sat up straight at Kurt’s abruptness. “Yeah,” he breathed nodding dumbly.

“And do you still feel that way about me?” Kurt asked not taking his eyes off of Blaine.

“Yeah, I do.” Blaine confessed, silently begging Kurt to believe him.

“Okay, pick me up tomorrow at five.” Kurt responded turning towards the door.

“Wait!” Blaine jumped up gently grabbing Kurt’s hand to stop him from leaving. As soon as he touched Kurt’s fingers he felt goose bumps and a small tingle go up his arm. “What am I picking you up at five for?” He asked confused.

Kurt let out a small laugh, his smile so genuine that Blaine couldn’t help but smile back. “For our date … to you know … uh see where things go?” He shrugged.

Blaine only nodded dumbly not able to form words at this moment. Kurt just asked him on a date or said yes to a date. He isn’t positive who was asking and who was accepting, all he knew was Kurt wanted to go on a date with him.

“Is that a yes?” Kurt asked, nervously biting his lip.

“Yes! Five!” Blaine rushed out, his mind still trying to catch up.

“Five.” Kurt giggled.

Blaine stared him for a couple more seconds before Kurt giggled again.

“Finn is waiting outside so I need to-“ Kurt started singling that Blaine needed to let go of his hand.

“Oh –right - sorry.” Blaine laughed nervously, letting go of Kurt’s hand before running ahead of him to open the door. “Five” He said instead of goodbye.

“Yes, tomorrow at five.” Kurt confirmed with a bright smile before walking to his car. He awkwardly waved goodbye before he got in. 

Blaine waved back slowly closing the door and leaning back on it letting out a breathy sigh. He stayed there for a moment imagining himself as Kurt’s boyfriend, then straightening up and rushing back to his room to plan everything out. It needed to be perfect.

Blaine ended up being slightly early to pick up Kurt. It wasn’t on purpose he was just so excited that he couldn’t really wait much longer, and he wanted to allow time in case there was unexpected traffic. Kurt wouldn’t mind he was early; Kurt was always prompt if not a little early for things, never liking to show up late to things. Blaine took one last calming breath and a quick check in the car mirror before heading to the door. He knocked with false confidence, wondering if he should have stopped for flowers, regretting that he didn’t think of flowers before. Blaine unintentionally took a step back when Burt answered the door with a knowing smirk.

“Blaine, it’s good to see you again. Please come in,” he greeting opening the door wider for Blaine to enter the house.

Blaine nodded with a smile, making sure to wipe his feet on the mat before entering the house quickly debating on calling him Burt or Mr. Hummel or Mr. Burt. Blaine feels like he threw him off with the name thing on purpose, to skip him up or something.

“I’m sorry I’m a little early. Traffic was lighter than I expected.” Blaine explained nervously as he stepped inside.

“Kurt’s almost ready … well I thought he was ready two outfits ago but when I said he looked fine he just mumbled something and went back to his room to start over.” Burt said with a smirk.

“Dad!” Kurt exclaimed from the stairs, obviously embarrassed by what his dad said.

“What?” Burt asked not so innocently. Kurt simply rolled his eyes in response.

“I saw you pull up and I tried to beat my Dad to the door so he couldn’t torture you, sorry I wasn’t in time to save you.” Kurt joked, smiling brightly.

Blaine was frozen in his spot. Kurt was stunning in his simple gray button down jacket with a scarf neatly folded in, the pants weren’t the tightest he has seen Kurt wear, which is probably a good thing, but the long white strips elongated his legs and his knee length boots only helped with showing off the length of his legs. The outfit was simple for Kurt, minus the hippo broach pinned to the left side of his jacket.

“You look amazing,” Blaine said breathlessly.

“Thank you” Kurt responded with a blush.

“Okay you two have a good time. Stay safe and be home by 11:30.” Burt lectured before rushing them out the door, reminding them to have a good time. 

Blaine quickly rushed ahead to open the car door for Kurt. He took another calming breath before entering the driver side of the car. He fumbled slightly with his seat belt because of his nerves but Kurt gently touched his hands offering him a reassuring smile and he was able to finally calm himself down.

“So where are we going?” Kurt asked as he pulled out of the development.

“The community theater is putting on a production of Into the Woods. I know it’s no Broadway but-“ Blaine answered, rambling slightly at the end.

“It’s perfect.” Kurt responded with a smile. “If it’s anything like their production of RENT I am sure it will be wonderful, and if not we will still have plenty of things to discuss afterwards.”

They were quiet as Blaine concentrated on the small amount of traffic on the roads. He remembered taking Kurt to see RENT. That should have been their first date. No time would have been wasted that way, but the timing wasn’t right then. At that time Kurt needed a friend, a confident. Or maybe Blaine needed that. It just took him a while to learn you can be both at the same time; friend, boyfriend, confident, it could all work as one relationship.

“I don’t think I have thanked you yet” Kurt spoke softly breaking Blaine of his thoughts.

“For what?” He asked confused what Kurt was referring to.

“For always being there for me. Not even just now with my recovery, but also with helping me with Karofsky. I really don’t know where I would be without you, and I know it’s not something you like hearing but I was so lonely before I met you,” Kurt answered honestly.

“I was lonely too Kurt. I kind of lost myself at Dalton. I fell into their mold, trying to hide from something,” Blaine confessed, “but then I found you or you found me and helped me find myself. … That sounded so dumb,” Blaine laughed at himself shaking his head, not taking his eyes away from the road.

“No … I get it.” Kurt reassured reaching over and giving Blaine’s forearm a reassuring squeeze.

“So I was thinking before the show we could grab a bite to eat. I know you’re supposed to be on a diet but David told me about this diner a block away from the theater that has authentic New York style cheesecake?” Blaine half asked half stated as he parked the car in a lot next to the theater.

“I’m sure if you shared it with me, one slice of cheesecake wouldn’t kill me.” Kurt responded, almost bouncing in his seat with excitement.

They walked closely together, close enough to be touching, but not holding hands. He knew he couldn’t push the PDA because even though it was a theater it was still Ohio and people still weren’t all tolerant of it. Blaine was grateful no one seemed to even glance their way or bat an eyelash at them, but he still had to be careful.

The diner seemed to be semi crowded, but not so much that they had to wait for a seat. Kurt ordered a small side salad, with oil and vinegar on the side. Blaine ordered the Italian wedding soup, even though Kurt told him not to order healthy because of him. Blaine reassured him that the soup was delicious and it was the one thing his mom could not make. Blaine also made sure to order a special slice of cheesecake for Kurt as their dessert.

They caught up on mundane things about Dalton and The Warblers, stuff like what Wes was planning for regionals and what David dumb things David said to his girlfriend. Blaine embarrassingly mentioned how much he has been distracted thinking about Kurt lately, which caused both of them to blush brightly.

Kurt caught Blaine up on what he found out about Finn and The New Directions.

“I can’t believe he was jealous of me.” Blaine lightly laughed.

“I can’t believe he liked spending time with me after the lamp incident I kind of just thought he only did it cause my dad asked or something” Kurt attempted to joke.

“Who wouldn’t enjoy hanging out with you? You’re the best person I know.” Blaine exclaimed with a tone of seriousness.

Kurt blushed and shrugged picked a little at the cheesecake but not taking a bite. “I’m not exactly popular at Mckinely …” Kurt responded with a sad smile.

Blaine felt heavy that Kurt still thought of himself that way, he was amazing and he should know that. “Yeah well it’s obviously something in the water because everyone at Dalton thinks you’re amazing,” He said with finality, leaving no room for argument as he scooped off a bite of cheesecake and attempting to feed it to Kurt, who rolled his eyes but took it.

When the check came Blaine immediately took it not allowing Kurt to even glance for it.

“Kurt, it’s date so I’m paying.” Blaine argued as pulled out his wallet, calculating the proper tip.

“Fine, but I technically asked you so I get to pay for the next date.” Kurt insisted.

Blaine paused looking up, not sure if he heard Kurt correctly. “There’s going to be another date?” He asked breathlessly.

“I was hoping there would be” Kurt shrugged suddenly looking self-conscious as he began to fidget in his seat.

“I would love that,” Blaine beamed reaching across the table to give Kurt’s hand a squeeze. They stayed like that until the waitress came back and cleared her throat silently asking them to pay the check. Blaine blushed and decided to leave a little more then twenty percent as the tip to make up for it.

They walked back to the theater arm in arm; Blaine silently hoped it wouldn’t be as obvious as hand in hand. Again no one seemed to give them much attention. When they got to the theater Blaine picked up the tickets at the box office before finally taking Kurt’s hand in his and walking them both to their seats. He held Kurt’s hand the entire time they were at the theater and it felt so amazing Blaine wondered why he hadn’t noticed it before. During the show he took the risk to sit shoulder to shoulder, glancing at Kurt to silently ask if it was okay. In response Kurt leaned further in pulling Blaine’s arm around him. With Kurt there he was able to forgot about everyone around them. At intermission they awkwardly pulled away, both still new at this and feeling somewhat exposed when the house lights came up, but as soon as the show restarted they drifted back to the way they were before. 

When the show was over they walked back to the car, this time not holding hands or even standing close, there were too many people around and Blaine still wanted to be safe. Blaine’s hand and arm suddenly felt empty without Kurt and his instantly wished it would have been safe enough for them to walk like this at night. When they got to the car he made sure to open the car door again for Kurt. 

“Please forgive me but I have to ask,” Kurt apologized before continuing, “was it like this with Jeremiah?”

Blaine’s expression must have been comical because Kurt instantly had to suppress his laugh. “Don’t compare yourself to him, because it isn’t even a competition. Jeremiah wanted to be nothing more than friend’s with benefits. I blew the whole thing way out of proportion.” Blaine confessed with a serious tone. “He would never go anywhere this public and he wasn’t much of a cuddlier either. You were right that he didn’t want to be seen in public with me, or that he even told anyone about us. I was stupid for believing it was something different and more serious.”

“Blaine I’m sorry that he did that to you, but you’re not stupid for being a romantic. I would have done the same thing … I kind of did with you” He mumbled the last part, embarrassed.

“I’m terrible at romance, as you have witnessed.” Blaine laughed.

“I think you did pretty well tonight,” Kurt complimented overcoming his embarrassment.

“Thank you, and you didn’t blow it out of proportion. Some of the other guys thought the same thing you did. I wasn’t fair to you and what’s worse I didn’t even notice how I was leading you on. It was wrong for me to do that to you Kurt” Blaine apologized; hoping Kurt didn’t read his guilt the wrong way.

Kurt was quiet for a moment, at first Blaine thought it was in a bad way, but when he glanced over Kurt was giving him an adoring look.

“Maybe part of you always liked me and the rest of you just needed to catch up.”

“That sounds about right.” Blaine answered as he parked the car in front of Kurt’s house. “Can I walk you to the door?”

“I would like that” Kurt replied with a soft smile.

For the last time tonight Blaine ran around the car to open the passenger door. He held his hand as they walked up to the porch. He didn’t want the night to end.

“I had a great time tonight, thank you for the date.” Kurt spoke softly.

“Thank you for letting me take you on a date” Blaine responded his voice filled with fondness and honesty. He looked at Kurt a moment longer, long enough to make him blush and look away. “Kurt…” he started, hoping he had enough courage to follow through.

“Yeah?” Kurt breathed looking back at Blaine.

“Can I? I mean I would really like to” Blaine stuttered until Kurt cut him off with a kiss. Without any more hesitation Blaine began to kiss Kurt back, placing a hand on his soft cheek. He pulled away, reluctantly … breathlessly. Kissing Kurt was a feeling he could not describe.

“Wow” Kurt whispered.

“Yeah,” Blaine responded just as quietly and breathless.

“I should go inside” Kurt finally said after another moment.

“Call me tomorrow?” Blaine requested.

“I will” Kurt promised lingering in front of the door another moment before finally heading inside.

As Blaine walked to the car he heard the front door open and Kurt call his name. He turned around and suddenly had an armful of Kurt.

“Just one more kiss and then I really have to go inside,” Kurt beamed. Blaine laughed but gladly fulfilled his request.

“Tomorrow?” he breathed as they pulled away from each other again.

“Tomorrow and as long as you’ll have me” Kurt answered brightly.

Blaine would have Kurt with him for all eternity if Kurt allowed, but he kept that to himself deciding to take their new relationship on step at a time.


End file.
